Thursday, July 31, 2008

Bat signal up?

Talk about rallying the troops. All my heroes are showing up.

Now Michael is taking me to X-Files tonight and my brother is coming down for a day of packing on Sunday. Totally initiated by them, no prompting from me.

And none of you guys read my blog. Dave said he just had this feeling he had to text me and that I needed to hear what he said.

Crazy.

Thank you for being there for me and helping. I'm just sayin' it out into the universe, since it seems to be working and you're hearing it all as "help Lis not have a nervous breakdown"...

Oh jeez, and if you're a girlfriend feeling hurt that I'm not returning phone calls or paying enough attention to you, it so isn't about you. I really am in crisis mode; have been all July between packing and putting out financial fires and preventing a huge problem with the movie.

If it sounds like I'm off having fun all the time, A) I'm not. And B) it's just because my male friends are sussing out that I'm about to snap, and they initiate our friendship by doing shit like show up at my front door and forcing me to go to a movie with them (that ALWAYS calms me down), or feeding me when I haven't eaten all day, or take the box and packing tape out of my shaking hands.

Guys are better equipped to deal with me in panic mode, when I'm like a chipmunk with ADD on speed. They don't take any of my antisocial behaior personally, and somehow have a sixth sense that I'm in trouble and need help.

But I love you ladies too and look forward to seeing you when I'm sane again. Don't hate me.

Crash

I'm not a big fan of this movie across the board, I thought the arguments about racism were too simplified for a general American audience. But I just happened to turn on FX and catch the scene where Matt Dillon's and Thandie Newton's characters reconnect at the car crash and they have to forgive each other to work together and save her life. Pretty spectacular scene. Love the acting, music and where slow-mo was used.

Oh, and the latest commercial for THE SHIELD's final season this fall? As rad, gutsy, and fresh as the show. I said rad.

I do hate politically that I love FX so. But I can't quit it.

To Todd, Bill, Mark, and Dave

Thanks for the reminders, and I so appreciate your friendships!

And another thing...

If you yourself have said you treated me shoddily during our relationship and are begging for my unearned lifetime friendship after I've ended things with you?

And I ask you not to turn off Gmail IM's chat record in the context of I can't process what you're saying without it?

Best not to throw my publicly on the record* head injury disability back in my face as my desperate, made-up attempt to get you not to leave me.

After I've broken up with you.

Ahem.

I mean, I don't know...do I feel like your friend now?


Please remind me again why I'm championing men and staying a loving, open, accepting woman. Because you all feel very far away right now, like I'm looking up at you from underwater.


* See brother's famous book. And my blog. And my website.

It's official: hot woman closed for business

I'm sorry, guys. Somebody ruined it for the rest of you.

Until I'm ready to commit to someone and vice versa, I'm only up for chaste good night kisses.

Having had a wonderful first date with someone and rounding more bases than I was comfortable with without a committment only to never hear from again* in the middle of all this other chaotic awfulness in my life**...

I'm done. My heart was too tender to be treated carelessly.

I feel foolish.

I feel my trust was thrown away; taken for granted and taken advantage of.

I feel I can't take any more hits to my self-esteem.

I need and want a man who takes care of me and respects me, and clearly I'm not going to get there unless I do that first for myself by not giving ANYONE my unearned trust or benefit of the doubt.

No idea what this decision will do to my sexuality.

But I know that it will save my sanity and the little leftover shards of my heart.

And I hate to say it, but it's really hard right now not to make sweeping generalizations that will thrust me over to Prague.

CORRECTONS:
*Ah...I did hear from him about it being a lovely date. I did not hear from him again about having the previously discussed second date.

**I'm so sick of my life I have no energy right now to fill you guys in on the bad stuff. Lucky you!!!

Catwoman

Aaaand here it is. Told you so.

Wow. Hollywood prognostication gets easy once you've paid attention for twenty years.

Goodbye to Mom's Cancer...

.blogpost.com and congratulations to Brian's next chapter.

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Duuuuuuude

I was sooooo floating on Ambien when I wrote that David Lago post.

I usually don't even take aspirin, so you can imagine...well, you don't have to imagine. You saw the typos!

Poppin' and typing don't mix, kids. Stay sober, and stay in school.

Mr. Jed Hammel


Our good friend and once upon a time PISTOLERAS line producer Jed Hammel has a cool music video making the rounds this summer at a film festival near you. (Dances With Film, WeHo Film Festival, etc!!!)

He co-directed THE NIGHT DIVINE for the amazingly talented and ethereal Heather, aka LO-FI SUGAR. It's no longer available online so that you have to see it onscreen where it belongs. But trust me, you missed out. The visuals are very well done, and Heather has celestial talent.

We're talking to her about featuring three of her songs in THE COMMUNE with a nice juicy card in the front credits, and are hoping it works out. If it does, and all parties are amenable, how cool would it be if we can offer our distributor Jed's video as a lovely extra feature on the DVD?

Friends helping talented friends. Delightful!

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

David Lago lovers

The night the D & E named me Lizzie MicTitties. Bratty little brothers.

I've been asked by a fan club of his to post some photos from THE COMMUNE movie. This should fill you ladies over for a while. More soon!! Please spread the word around about the photos, and his videos on Youtube!








That's me giving Chauntal and Dave a little direction adjustment. Something like "tone the sexual tension down so you don't burst into flames!" hhaaahhahaha.
Hanging out afterwork on the 'mune, all of us learning Chauntal's dance routine. Look at Stuart going for it, and Dave concentrating really hard.

This is how Dave wakes up every morning. Bewildered and Puck-like under a soft tree. Once he remembers which show he's supposed to be doing, he goes to the trailer, and the makeup and hair girls shave off the goatee that grows back every night, file down his goat horns to tuck them from view, and remind him that he is half human during the day and must walk upright and not say things like "Verily that chick is molten...with a little guyliner, mead, and some tap dancing from my hooves, verily she will mewl and rut tonight for me under the full moon. Huzaaah!"*

*writer/director's interpretation. David Lago may in fact, not, be the god Pan.

Monday, July 28, 2008

Dark City director's cut

Boy, do I want to see this DVD. Anyone in LA with a Blu-Ray player up for it next week?

From Aintitcool.com:

Quint: I think of a lot of the filmmakers working today, you are definitely one out to make an impression. I remember vividly seeing DARK CITY for the first time. We had not seen a film like that in a very long time, where it’s kind of like a jumping off of the great early Gilliam movies, you know? It’s like we just don’t have those movies that are kind of dark and complex.
Alex Proyas: Well the studios don’t want us to make them and in fact I am just about to release the director’s cut of DARK CITY and that’s coming out next week.

Quint: On Blu-Ray?
Alex Proyas: It’s on Blu-Ray and it’s about ten or eleven minutes longer than the theatrical version of the film and it was a great process to go back into the movie, because the movie was compromised when we made it. It didn’t test very well and the studio got very nervous and we had to make some concessions to it and I had forgotten how many I actually made and I was actually quite surprised to go back to the director’s cut and look at it and go “Well, it’s really quite a different movie.” The movie that I intended to make, the one coming out, it was two quite different films, so I am really happy that I was able to go back to reinstate what was there originally.

Quint: Do you think having that distance helped? Because it has been what ten years or so? Do you think that you made a different cut now than you would have made had you had the complete freedom to release what you wanted at the time?
Alex Proyas: I don’t think so, because I literally went back and… yeah there is always that possibility, but I actually went back to the original cut, the pre-test screening cut and I pretty much reinstated that. I didn’t actually change… I may have made some amendments here and there, but not a lot and it really showed me that the film that I made was actually not dissimilar to the one I probably would make now.

Obviously technology has changed and visual effects have improved and all of that sort of stuff that we know about, but really my process was undermined because of lack of confidence I guess. I am probably a little braver maybe now than I was then. I have a little more experience and I am probably more willing to stick to my guns now than I was then possibly, so it is all of that psychological stuff that comes in as a filmmaker, but beyond that it’s pretty much what I intended on originally.

I know that feeling. Now that I've gone through the entire filmmaking process and seen how often I was right, next time I will darn well stick to my guns. On PISTOLERAS, I'm getting everything I want unles I say differently...

Step up, Secret Admirer

Okay. Got my attention.

That was a lovely, thoughtful gift.

I am very confused, and I pride myself on being a detective.

Which of you gentleman callers was it?

FADE IN Magazine's allegedly non-paying screenwriting contest

It has been a year, and I've still not received my prize money.

So yes, the reputation they've developed for not following through on the advertised award money (see Movie Bytes) is now supported by my personal experience.

I've been contacted by some other "winners" whose communication with FADE IN MAGAZINE has likewise been ignored, and we're discussing starting yet another class action lawsuit against them. It is the second that I am aware of. I also have had an in-depth conversation in person with a vocal winner from years ago who finally took them to small claims court, and had his reputation smeared by them online for his troubles.

For the life of me, if you do the math of how many entrants they have a year times their contest fee, I can't understand how they continue to legally operate while allegedly consistently not paying out a comparable paltry award amount each year.

Particularly since the instant I placed, I was contacted by several colleagues in the industry and warned of this very scenario. In a town where you are nothing but your reputation, I'm surprised this business has continued to flourish.

In the meantime, don't take my title from them as an endorsement of their contest. To the best of my knowledge, there was also no release to industry trades of the contest or any attempt to inform production companies. And no one (agent, producer, etc.) has ever contacted me because of they heard of my screenplay through FADE IN MAGAZINE.

(By the way, it might be apples to oranges, but my other screenwriting contest experience was with CREATIVE SCREENWRITNG MAGAZINE three months later. They threw a banquet for us, handed me my check onstage at the Expo, and sent out notices to production companies and trades within a month, apologizing that it took so long.)

Sunday, July 27, 2008

Hurry up

Illegal Wolverine teaser from con Here.

Dammit. Mom would've LOVED this movie. All they needed to do was throw in Michael Clark Duncan and she would've been squeeling.

Do it for Mom!!

Brenda (Nurse Sis) is raising money for the FREE TO BREATHE lung cancer 5k fundraiser. Her goal is $1500 and right now she's at $400.

Barbara says 5k or your money! Go here to be a hero!

Saturday, July 26, 2008

John Rogers is a boyfriend stealer!!

Man! I thought JR was a stand-up guy (har-har)...Can't trust anyone around Mark Waid these days...DAMN COMIC-CON. *Sniff*

I may not be there, but I have spies. We are legion.

Friday, July 25, 2008

Lions get me every time

Mr. Charles Yoakum

One of my creative partners in crime, artist extraordinaire Charles Yoakum just called me on the way to the San Diego airport.

I've been his "convention wife" the past seven years (his real wife, wonderful Alaina has long since tired of it).

He said I didn't miss anything. Yea!

Charles has an interesting perspective up on what he's now dubbed Media Con. I think that's perfect. Lets make that name stick.

Well, he loved THE DARK KNIGHT. Thought it was spectacular and epic. Didn't mind the length. Became enthralled when the Joker blew up the jail, which is exactly when I became disenchanted.

I wish I'd had his experience. Again, as a director who just spent June trimming ANOTHER damn five minutes from my film, I'm always going to be of the less is more, kill your babies, say it as fast as you can or you're a self-indulgent schmuck filmmaking model.

Interestingly, since we're simpatico on so much (and obviously PISTOLERAS), Charles did not like UNBREAKABLE and wishes he'd had my experience loving it. It's in my top 20, and I can weep when I describe it to people. He, on the other hand, guessed every comic mythos nuance from the beginning while I viewed it like an awed child.

Guess that's the way I felt about DARK KNIGHT too. Having studied Batman so much for my thesis, the philosophies blowing everyone else away didn't break any new ground for me. They were self-evident.

Yes. We switched viewing experiences because of our varied expertise. Too much knowledge can ruin storytelling. That's the danger of becoming a filmmaker.

Every movie has an audience. We can't all love the same things.

And at least we both hated THE HAPPENING. Hahahaha...

The Dark Knight - SPOILERS

By Xena's beard, I can't take it anymore...why do you all want to know what I think??

Neither my date or I were bowled over, and we're both big Batman geeks. He gave it a 3 out of 5. I gave it a 4 out of 5.

We both thought it started out incredibly strong (Oh! The high hopes I had!!!), was a squirm-inducing half hour to forty minutes too long (just like all the damn Pirate movies), and that the last act was done poorly and tried to cram in too much unsupported philosophy. The third act is not time for the kitchen sink, friends. Save it for your next film.

The acting was great.

It had the same problems as almost every other comic movie made I've been bitching about for almost 20 years now...too many villains and killing villains for no reason with no payoff; ruining the universe they've spent 2 hours painfully establishing. Grrrr!

I thought what they did right was Dent's makeup, Lucius Fox, Alfred again. The heist. Ledger in the nurse outfit. The pencil. Sally Maroni off the roof. The realistic batman toys. The violence in general. Batman's no killing rule, but just baaarely. Batman's fatigue and eagerness for a real life. The set design. The reference to Joker's henchmen being schizophrenic. The pile of money (Dick Sprang-like, yes? No? I think so...) Commisioner Loeb, hahaha...

And finally, using a villain the way the comics do...bless how they used Scarecrow. More of that! More of coming into the middle of a story, the middle of an established universe. No more origin! THAT'S the true comic-reading experience. Not knowing what's going on but diving in, catching up. Like life! Everyone else's stories have already started, and you suss it out as you go...

Which you can't do in movies when you keep KILLING EVERYONE. Should have had Dent mysteriously slink off into the night after killing the first driver, to pop up later in another movie. Batman could have accidentally killed a SWAT cop and still had his fall from grace. God that whole Two-Face thing became so grating and BAD after the first driver...Maudlin.

I thought the boat thing teetered on the same edge of 9/11 congratulatory calamity as Spiderman's ferry of New Yorkers tossing crap at the goblin...it made me uncomfortable the whole time. If you're going to have the fabulous violence that precludes a child audience then take on the sophisticated Jungian arguments of Legends Of The Dark Knight books...give us morality issues to sink our teeth into and argue about! Don't kowtow now...Let's philosophize! That's what comics are for. The establishing of morality and ethics of a civilization through tribal fables.

I felt the editing in the second half was langorous and masturbatory. Faster towards the climax people, none of you are virgins...get it right!

Whole thing jumped the shark for me when the cop car chose to detour through Joker's route. Really?? Oh god, and Jim Gordon's non-existent son...shoot the fucker. Christ. Birth Oracle already. Get rid of the towhead idealist standing in for all you male viewers' youths believing in Batman. TOOOOO heavy-handed.

I'm not stoked about the Knightfall plot for the next one. It was never a favorite of mine and it took up so much of 90s comic time. I thought it was pretty kitschy they even used the title as a line. We get it already, trust me. "Knightfall: Batman 3 July 2011" Cautiously optimistic it gives them something new to cook up. What new moral theme now?


Obviously they want to do Catwoman next (Alfred's line about cat scratches). Bet it will be Loeb's mob tie-in story. Okay, that's brilliant. Great tie-in to Batman being thought of as on the side of wrong. More Loeb, please. For me, he's the one true Batman storyteller. Really enjoyed Roberts as Sally. Would pee a little if they had a scene on a skyscraper grecian rooftop with Sally, Selina, and Batman.
.
Also next movie? The Creeper. You heard me. Anthony Michael Hall's role and viral videos are grooming him to be The Creeper, not The Riddler. Mark my words. You come back here in 2 years and tell me I was right. Johnny Smith is The Creeper. Groomed from his post traumatic stress brush with The Joker.

Shame. Who they should really do next is Hugo Strange. Or Hush.

I think anyone who calls this movie Miller-esque instead of Loeb/Moore-worship is a comic retard.

I'm grumpy that the third act sucked when it could have been a great movie.

Let me just sit this one out from now on, okay? I think to watch it again, I'll first have to do my own DVD edit.

Guess I can go read everyone else's reviews now. I've been totally insulated.

I know...you know what I really think? That they just upped my 4.5 stars for Iron Man to five.

God, is there anything worse then having a long bad third act? I always feel like I got crapped on when I leave. A Story is a Promise! God. Not the third act. Noooooo...ugh....

Ohhhhh how I wanted to love The Dark Knight!!! Siiigh. Disappointing. There. My two cents. Happy? Your mileage may vary, and this time I don't really care to hear it. I know, I'm a woman, and therefore WRONG.

Grum-py.

Connections

My first real job, naturally, was in a video store. The year Miracle Mile was released to video. I had a crush on a fellow worker, Michael Wall, who had no time for me, but loved this little film. He would put that movie on everytime there was enough of a lull that we could actually watch it. The iconic, amazing poster hung in the window the entire year I worked there.

Right after college, I moved to this little street in Miracle Mile. It was like being back in the dorms, only everyone was cool. An artists' ghetto. Me and a streetful of fun, broke, drunk creators trying to make it in LA. How we loved the romantic art deco architecture, the LACMA, outdoors jazz, the tarpits, the strange 1970s tarpits museum untouched by time, and watching Miracle Mile together. Slightly different ages, but we'd all grown up with nuclear drills in school (Hide under the desk? Really?) and a lifetime of nightmares from THE DAY AFTER. And we're all still friends now, a decade later.

It's funny how life works, and how movies and the internet can connect us.

After I saw Cloverfield, by a writer I admired, I wrote a diatribe saying it crossed the line into plagiarism IMHO and stole too much uncredited from Miracle Mile. That the MM writer/director Steve De Jarnatt is a genius who should have been given thanks by Cloverfield scribe Drew Goddard, and that fans of Miracle Mile would really like to see Steve get back on the creative horse and make another brilliant movie for us.

Steve DJ ended up reaching out to me on Myspace and wishing me well on my own projects, and we've had some lovely chats I'm grateful for. Again, I'm an incredibly lucky and blessed artist.

Meanwhile, someone I was dating gave Miracle Mile a 2 out of 5 stars on Netflix, and strangely enough it was a big eye opener for me. A big WOW. Not sure there's anything there with this person creatively or romantically. Who is he as a man?

I'm normally not a snob about my lists and think that pop culture taste is the least healthy criteria to use for mating, but there's something reaaaaally special about this film. And people who know storytelling (like Drew Goddard ahem) are bowled over and wiped out by it.

By the raw emotion. The wonderful tiny details. The twenty other stories going on we get little hints at. The sheer romanticism of it. The believability. The performances. The stunts accomplished on a small budget. The sly subversions. The humanist viewpoint. The timelock. The dialogue ("Is that your blood or mine?") Over and over again, the inevitable happening and that Steve had the balls to make it the worst thing that could happen each time (Robert McKee's The Negation of the Negation, which almost no storyteller has the guts to do). That Julie becomes a worthy heroine and not a cypher. The way Harry steps up and BECOMES A MAN.

I never considered myself a pitcher, but I think I learned to pitch telling people about Miracle Mile. Because of my passion for the story. Because of the joy I felt when people who had never heard of the movie lit up when I told them how it begins as a romantic drama about a guy who has finally met the love of his life, and then on page 17 he answers a payphone at 4 am...

He answers a payphone and intercepts a call meant for somebody's father. A call from a missile silo. A frantic soldier, saying the nuclear warhead is heading to LA. In 70 minutes. To get out now. And then that soldier is confronted by his superiors, and shot, and Anthony Edwards is told by them to go back to sleep and forget everything he's heard...

From then on out, the movie is 24, realtime. WHAT WOULD YOU DO? Do you believe it? Do you wake up that one loved person you can't live without? How do you convince them? Where do you go to be safe?

And the real genius every screenwriter cites is how LONG it takes for us to know if the phone call is real or not.

The movie is pure campfire bliss. It's in my top 10, and I truly consider it one of the greatest storytelling accomplishments I've ever seen. Absolutely magical.

And I'm in great company. The people who "get it" will go to the mat for this little film that could. Brilliant creators themselves. Every one of their souls blazes as they discuss it and the tiny details that make it sing.

Funny how interwoven it is into my dating life now.

One bachelor, who was the editor for years of a well-respected film magazine, told me that Steve DJ was his first interview ever...That he lied about being a journalist to get the interview just so he could talk for an hour to this amazing artist and indirectly owes his journalism career to him. That he'd love to make the last lines of the film his wedding vows.

A fellow director listened to how much I loved this film and that I'd broken up with someone who didn't get it, and arranged for us to have an intimate romantic screening of it after cooking me an amazing gourmet brunch. All in the middle of his hectic shooting schedule and Con. It felt so special sharing it with him. He vocally adored it and reached out so many times to me during the movie. Turns out he works in a building that is a huge plot point, and jogs past me and the geography of the film every day on his marathon course (Of course I live in the towers Julie lived in. Because I'm that much of a romantic sap.)

Who knows who I'll end up dating longterm or if I'll ever meet Steve in person or if he or I'll ever make another movie, or how the hell you pronounce his last name. But I feel so blessed to have shared the experience of Miracle Mile with the people I have, and to feel interwoven into their lives in a meaningful way. That Steve DJ gave us all the gift of reflection, wonder, and FEELING. That his art shone a light on what it is to be human.

"You and me Harry. We're going to be diamonds."

Thursday, July 24, 2008

The Dr. Horrible debate...revolutionary dissemination or up yours to indie filmmakers?

Whether you loved it or hated it (I loved it), Dr. Horrible opens up a whole can of worms that must be discussed.

From Joss:

"Proving we can turn Dr Horrible into a viable economic proposition as well as an awesome goof will only inspire more people to lay themselves out in the same way. It’s time for the dissemination of the artistic process. Create more for less."

Bold statements coming from Mr. Whedon's lips. I imagine he wants us to discuss and analyze and implement. So let's!

Does Dr. Horrible prove the thesis that it financially pays for an indy producer to release a movie for free on the internet? Joss is claiming to have invented a revolutionary model.

With all the comic connections, blurbs, screenwriting awards, charm, Eisner & Spirit Award connection, kick-ass ten page sample, marketing chops, video game/webseries/toy-ready sexy material, and a professional comic artist attached, I still had no interest from anyone last year at Con in my PISTOLERAS graphic novel because it wasn't a movie yet. The publishers all said they'd come on board the second it was a feature hit.

Well, duh.

ALL the fields are hedging their bets waiting until you make it in another first. That's how dire the recession is, and why I'm trying to figure out if Joss's claims are true and should be emulated.

I maintain...Dr. Horrible's success could not be duplicated by a non-name.

Say the playing fields were even and I had his scritp and directing skills. At the least, my budget would have been five times his because name actors and experienced crew wouldn't have done free for a non-name. (Dr. H may have been accomplished by Joss for 125k, but we all know that was a 500k project. A 30 minute 500k project. This budget does not qualify as indy anywhere outside of the studio system.).

AND releasing it on the web wouldn't have generated a press mediastorm, Variety reviews, and instant hits from legion of foaming-mouth fans.

Thus it is not a revolutionary HD Indy blueprint yet.

I fail to see who in the indy world it's paving the way for.

"It’s time for the dissemination of the artistic process. Create more for less."

Frankly, Dr. H has just made everything harder for us.

Because now audiences are going to expect that level of technological accomplishment from all of us. 500k for 125k. Oh yeah. And give it to them FOR FREE.

There's another reason to add "damn you" to the front of his name.

I see Dr. H as a great accomplishment for anyone in Hollywood with a name, some money, and some pet projects they can't get funded. Awesome plan for them. They can rule the world and create their own Lucasvilles.

And it's a huge "up yours" to everyone without the above who has been struggling for years to get their work out making actual 125k* indy films. It's comparing shiny pesticide-sprayed apples to organic, bruised oranges. And everyone in Hollywood loves a pretty facelift.


* Why the importance of 125k?

Because that's the accepted, democratic, "anyone who cares should be able to raise that amount" indy budget. Most people can put it together once to make their dream. Few can put it together twice. Almost no one unknown can raise 500k.

And no, I don't believe that was Joss's intention. To screw indy filmmakers. Never the less...the road to hell...

SDCC Um....no.

This is what Wednesday night preview night now looks like:

Fuck all of you Hollywood star-fucking whores who ruined Con.

COMIC-con.

Fuckers.

In search of redemption

Crisis averted. Nurse Sis thinks it's only a sprain. She saw my toe in the dark of a nightclub, but still...If Shawna and co. were to call drunk from Con and tell me to get my ass down there, I'd probably still be tempted to drive at Friday 2 am and walk around Hall H with them...

By the way, don't care if he has a show or not...Love the Ebert.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Criminetly!

Only three days after our date, come off my cloud to realize...

I BROKE MY TOE.

WEDGED UNDER HIM ON THE COUCH WHILE WE WERE MAKING OUT LIKE SCHOOLKIDS.

Like, a SERIOUS BREAK DOWN BY THE KNUCKLE.

And I didn't care or notice until now. It looks ghastly. I still pretty much don't care. Even that I don't have health insurance.

Huh.

Guess scientists aren't kidding about the raging sex drive of women my age.

What type of protection should I be wearing to my DARK KNIGHT date with bachelor #2 tomorrow? I'm fearing for my safety.

Funny how NOW that I know about it, it throbs...hahaha...

Really?

I've worked on the movie for eleven months and you have nothing to say about the scene below?

C'mon guys...you withhold, I withhold...

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

THE COMMUNE - Scene #2 Chauntal Lewis & David Lago

Starring internet sensation Chauntal Lewis and Emmy winner David Lago:

Monday, July 21, 2008

The universe giveth and...

Five big blows on Friday and Saturday, across the board, every area of my life. Should be KO'ed. Somehow I'm still Chumbawumbaing. No one ever said overhauling your life would be easy...but it's necessary to create a joyful, empowered one.

Had an absoltely lovely date provided for me yesterday. Great guy. I feel so appreciative!

Still haven't seen "The Dark Knight". No idea how that is possible...

Ebert & Roeper

Aha. And now the press release about Roeper leaving makes sense. God bless them. Hope they come up with some internet show they own the rights to and continue on, minus corporate America.

Sunday, July 20, 2008

John Connor


I don't know...nothing has sounded right. How is this not going to be T3 all over again? But...yeah...Christian Bale looks okay here. I hope he has a big ass scar, or is given one.

They're messing again with one of our favorite fables...Do I want to see what the corporation has cooked up? Or do I just want to go bask in T1/T2 again, made with the unabashed tenderness and ferocity of a feminist auteur who cared about sacred storytelling?

"It's a form of prayer: The greatest films are meditations on why we are here."

Take him out back

You know what a fan I am of Alison Armstrong.

In one of the classes, I believe the co-ed UNDERSTANDING WOMEN, she talked in her ceaselessly respectful way about men and how the feminist moms did a disservice to them, coddling them from reproach from their fathers. That it was so painful for the mothers to watch their sons be made wrong and told no, that they begged their husbands/brothers/uncles not to do it.

And that too many men were raised then without the necessity of an adult male pulling them aside and firmly telling them "No! That is not how a man behaves. That is not honor, integrity, responsibility." That this is a CRUCIAL part of a man's upbringing and a great disservice to his soul if he can not be taught this by other men; kept in line by other men; taught right from wrong. That women must allow it to happen, but that husbands could learn to work with this pain women suffer by taking the boy out back and disciplining him away from the mother's unconditional love.

(I witnessed male on male disciplining all the time in the dojang and had great respect for it...it is something I've discussed as being necessary and missing from women's self-defense training and it frightens the beejesus out of me that women are falsely empowered without responsibility, and frankly, an unfair fight they lose. Because life is nothing if not an unfair fight, and this false idea that we're all special and are going to win and deserve/are entitled to nothing but the best is what's bringing on Armageddeon.)

I'm so bone tired, I don't know if I'm going to be able to connect the dots...

I was raised by my mother to do the right thing and take responsibility for myself and to empower those around me when I had the strength to. Sometimes even when I didn't. And I was taught this is done because it's the right thing to do. And it was reinforced in me by the men I was blessed to grow up with in high school, in the dojang, in my comic books and stories. I was raised to be a warrior and I have fought side by side with men my whole life.

I guess I'm pondering...when I see this person whom I've given unconditional love to for the past ten months, who countless other women support and soothe and coddle and put first before their own happpiness and welfare...when I see him behave over and over again in a way that is suicidally destructive to himself, harmful to women, self-indulgent, intolerably cruel, and completely unbefitting of a man and deserving of no respect or validation...

Where are the men in his life? Why hasn't anyone stepped in to punch him out cold? Tell him to knock this shit off? To grow up and stop acting like a spoiled child. That there is no honor or decency in making someone else's tragedy all about him, that not standing by that person during their tragedy was unacceptable, and that to use it as an excuse for the rest of his life to indulgently mess around doing whatever he wants and using people for his whims is worse than the tragedy itself. That contrary to what he professes, his vices have made HIM the only person he can't trust. That he is a disgrace.

I don't understand. I don't think I'll ever understand.

Doesn't this person have friends to kick him in the head? Is it really going to be up to me to doorah him to the mat? Because I will. For the protection of society. To save his soul. And the best way is to remove myself from his life.

Saturday, July 19, 2008

Ol' Dot, my constant friend

The sun's gone dim, and
The moon's turned black;
For I loved him, and
He didn't love back.

- Dorothy Parker



My apologies to the men the past five years who have felt this way towards me. I assure you, karma is a bitch. Feel a little better? You were ALWAYS better than me. Always. You're so lucky you weren't with me. Feel even better? Sure you do, kiddo!

And look, sooooo many of you are married and happy now! It's crazy; I'm like Good Luck Chuck, only none of you got to sleep with me. Or kiss me. And most of you hate my fucking guts...

Surely there must be SOME sort of plan at work...some order to the universe about who we end up and who stomps on our hearts in steel-tipped Doc Martens. Right?


Look, all I know is...don't EVER respond to a Gmail chat at 2 am. Especially not when you're supposed to be sleeping before meeting CAA and William Morris agents all day. Words of wisdom to you. Free. I earned 'em the hard way.

PISTOLERAS reader feedback

Thought this was very cool. Comes from the BLUECAT contest PISTOLERAS is a quarterfinalist in:

Title of Screenplay Pistoleras
Archive # 2306

What did you like about this script?

This is a great script from top to bottom and was a wonderful read. It’s a fun concept, having a traditional spaghetti western structure mixed with a girl power twist. Although it lavishes in borrowing from classic films like The Good, The Bad and The Ugly, Terminator, Ghostbusters and Deadwood, it never feels like a pastiche of classics – instead, it acknowledges the influence and turns it into something pretty original. Everything that the script sets out to accomplish, it does; the comedy elements work, the action scenes are kick ass, the horror scenes are tense.

One of the best things about Pistoleras is that the characters are written with such respect. There’s a lot of heart and it’s fun to watch the characters grow over the course of the story. Casey is the big one, going from na├»ve copycat to tortured rape victim to badass hero – and the progression is logical. It’s easy to empathize with her every step of the way, from moments when she’s learning to use a tampon to when she’s forced into a dog cage in the Church dungeon. We’re with her every step of the way, so when she’s able to enact her revenge at C.C.’s ranch, it’s a very satisfying moment for the audience. Casey’s certainly the centerpiece, but others are given a considerable amount of development, too, like Allison going from the uptight good girl to someone who’s willing to risk everything to get her friend back – or Loco, as he matures into the action star he always dreamed of being.

The story is expertly paced and the description jumps off the page. It’s easy to read since you’re invested in what’s going on the entire time and it’s always easy to picture what’s going on in your mind’s eye.

Moreover, I think Pistoleras has mass appeal. It’s tense and full of action, it’s themes of female empowerment and exploitation are well played, the dialogue is smart and snappy, and it’s all wrapped up in a commercial package with four wise-cracking and sexy female protagonists. I’d pay to see it.

What do you think needs work?

There isn’t much that needs to be improved upon. This is a work that seems pretty fully realized and accomplishes what it sets out to.

If I’m going to be nitpicky, though, I do think the script might be about 10 pages too long. At 120 pages, Pistoleras isn’t taxing anybody’s patience, but I could see it being whittled down to 110 without losing any of what makes it great and being a little more accessible. I wouldn’t change the structure or do any mass hacking to the script, just going through with a critical eye and eliminating elements that do not serve the story. I would focus, too, primarily on the first 50 pages up until Allison, Jamie and Sophie meet up with Loco – maybe find a way to trim down the scenes where Allison and Jamie are wandering around arguing and looking for Casey, or trim those scenes with the girls flirting with the Christian dudes. These scenes are all essential, no doubt, and I wouldn’t lose them – but maybe just tighten them up.

Be aware, too, of typos and inconsistencies that hinder the script from looking perfect. I think that since this is so close to being a real winner, you want to make sure to not have anything get in the way – like, on page 27, The Driver speaks “to Casey” but, of course, he hasn’t captured Casey yet and he’s actually speaking to the Teenage Girl. It’s a typo, to be sure, but it’s probably in your best interest to have as few typos as humanly possible to ensure the best reading experience.

All in all, there really aren’t any significant negatives and a whole heap of overwhelming positives about Pistoleras. It’s fantastic. Good work.

Friday, July 18, 2008

I just peed a little...

Dr. Horrible part 3 up two hours early...is Joss an east coaster again? I assumed he was out here for Dollhouse.

Only two minutes into it and I had to post: "This is nice. I might have sex with the same girl twice. They say you get to do the weird stuff." CHORUS GIRLS: "We do the weird stuff!"

Oh lordy. Such a good year to be a geek goddess.

BTW, you guys following Diablo Cody on Twitter? She's having fun with her Diablo Cody run at the New Beverly. Entertaining stuff.

Dissemination of the Artistic Process

Hurry up peeps. Dr. Horrible is only online, free, until this Sunday. If you've already watched chapters 1 and 2 and can hardly stand waiting until Saturday for the exciting denoument...tide yourself over with the free tie-in comic book.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

And the hammer...is my penis

Act 1 of Dr. Horrible made me giggle a few times. Act 2? Sublime. Je t'aime, Dr. Horrible. Hand me the shiny keys to Australia. I'm yours: heart, body, soul. (Wow. Haven't given THAT in a year. Perhaps this time I won't come to in the gutter of Petco Park wondering what the eff just happened...)

Creative Screenwriting Expo 6 - PISTOLERAS win

Jim Mercurio introducing me.

Creative Screenwriting Expo 6 - Award Intro from Elisabeth Fies on Vimeo

Creative Screenwriting Expo 6 - Thriller winner speech, Elisabeth Fies from Elisabeth Fies on Vimeo.

Wendy can't save Peter Pan

Ohhhh if that ain't a life lesson. More importantly, Wendy no longer WANTS to save Peter Pan, and can't respect or stay attracted to him. Soooooo I ended it, whatever it was. Little while ago. Felt whoooosh! like I got all my power back. Radiant.

I'll never understand how some people can go through all kinds of heinous trials, have a bad upbringing and choose to become Oprah making the world a better place, while others with awesome loving parents get a hangnail, blame everyone but themselves, and become murderers. It's a strange world.

Anyway, here's something heartfelt I wrote to him back when I believed he wanted to become a Jedi, instead of using his energy for douchebaggery and harming women. Blacked out words to protect him.

My heart on my sleeve after the jump...

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Check out Jacques Thelemaque

Being all smartypants Indy. Love it.

Fastest Myers Briggs test ever

And my results were accurate. Nice little description of, well...me.



You Are An ENFP



The Inspirer


You love being around people, and you are deeply committed to your friends.

You are also unconventional, irreverent, and unimpressed by authority and rules.

Incredibly perceptive, you can usually sense if someone has hidden motives.

You use lots of colorful language and expressions. You're quite the storyteller!


In love, you are quite the charmer. And you are definitely willing to risk your heart.

You often don't follow through with your flirting or professed feelings. And you do break a lot of hearts.


At work, you are driven but not a workaholic. You just always seem to enjoy what you do.

You would make an excellent entrepreneur, politician, or journalist.


How you see yourself: compassionate, unselfish, and understanding


When other people don't get you, they see you as: gushy, emotional, and unfocused



And you are...?

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Opening scene from THE COMMUNE

Starring Chauntal Lewis, Leslie Lello, Hero, and me

Monday, July 14, 2008

Strange Prague

I often travel into a city with no plans of where I'm going to stay that night, knowing no one, and I always land on my feet and have a grand adventure and meet amazing people. People always take care of me.

But I've also travelled where I know someone or am two degrees separated from a guide who takes me to the non-tourists areas...and I love that.

Seeing as the whole reason I wanted to go to Prague the last dozen years is because I heard it was full of amazing creative generous spontaneous friendly artists, I've had it stuck in my head I'd be social and live it up in the "Paris of the 1920s." Meet some cool people and run around playing like kids. Make up for not studying abroad in college.

But I've reached out to 3 people in or with contacts in Prague and been rejected. It's all very queer and un-European-feeling. More separatist American, like "hey good luck with your trip, buy a guidebook like every other lame-ass American, and buh-bye." It's pissing me off. Waaaah! No one wants to play with me. Dammit! I'm charming and delightful!! Grumble.

Meanwhile, American friends from all around are sudddenly calling telling me not to go or to come back soon and that they want to play with me here in California or in NYC. And great menfolk are dropping out of the sky asking me on fun dates, and there's this intriguing job possibility....

Why does the universe always test me like this? This feeling of "You finally made a ballsy choice, but are you sure this is what you want? Really? Because behind Door #2 is..."

Door #2 is feeling better than Door #1.

Maybe I'll just go, czech Prague off my list, and do a lot of antisocial reading and writing in cafes. Seems like a waste of a good city of artists. Oh well. Enough energy spent planning and reaching out to near strangers. Time to hurtle myself into the abyss. What a clumsy dismount this one has been. Totally uncharacteristic and unrepresentative of my life.

Kudos

To two busy writers/directors/spectacular men who still managed to make it to Meg Martin's charity event for orphans at Hollywood Billiards Sunday night.

Scott Pendergrast, whose critically acclaimed Kabluey opened in LA last weekend. Go see it this week at the Sunset Laemle!

Stephen Calcote, whose Tokyopop movie Van Von Hunter finished principle shooting that day (now that's dedication to orphans! Or...drinking, playing pool, and more ass-grab threats from me.)

Pet peeve

For most my life it was exclusivity or judgement.

Now it's stinginess.

I don't undertand not sharing what you have. Who ARE you?

Technological retardation part 2

I've had Gmail for over a year now, and STILL the only way I can find any old emails I need to reply to is by using their search function.

I DON'T GET their conversation/cataloguing style. I've had more things to do fall through the cracks because of this function (or lack thereof).

Just now, I was trying to work quickly through my obnoxious inbox, and realized I sent three emails out in a row that had the search highlighting still in them. Subtext: "HI! I'm a superbusy, technologically retarded douche bag who doesn't give a shit about you! Hahahah!!!"

God, and I HATE having to go into the address book.

I know I'm supposed to just LOVE Gmail. I do think they do an excellent job of keeping spam out of my sight. But the rest makes my brain bruise.

Twinship

All their lives, my 20-year-old nieces have been pestered by the question "What's it like to be a twin?" Which of course is impossible to answer because they don't know what it's like NOT to be a twin.

And obviously, what people are ineptly trying to say is, "WOW! How does it feel to NOT have the existential loneliness that you were born alone, will die alone, and inbetween no one will ever understand you?!"

Totally appropriate smalltalk.

Principle photography!


Congratulations Mr. John Rogers!

Ca c'est quoi?

My eyes...they burn...my head...throbs...

GORBACHOV: THE MUSIC VIDEO - BIGGER AND RUSSIANER from Tom Stern on Vimeo.

Marvel vs. DC


Sunday, July 13, 2008

Technological retardation

I've been blogging for 3 plus years now, and am stuck in some bad habits that are going to drive you tech savvy people bonkers. I'm talking to you, my email subscribers.

What exactly happens when I edit and re-edit a post 5 times? Because I really like to do that...if I find a misspelled word, don't like the layout, think of a better turn of phrase...Do you get five different emails of the same post? How irritating for you I must be.

And you Google readers...ditto?

Ugh, you're not going to make me CHANGE for you, are you lovahs??

*Shudder*.

David Lago is a god

Really?

The whole fansites-devoted-to-Dave sends me into peels of giggles. I was with him when some of those photos were taken (Yes, I'm the magenta behind him in the cut-glove photo!! ME!!! Commence Elvis screaming!!!!). Ah, and all the dirt I have on my adopted little brother...so hard not to divulge. The things I could tell these swooning girls. The sheets I could sell them from all the times he's crashed at my pad in the spareroom or on my couch. So surreal.

Of course I won't. He's family to us Fies girls, and vice versa.

Saturday, July 12, 2008

Like I'm talking to myself...


Did any of you watch LIE WITH ME yet? Humph. Fine. Really, it was very good. Sigh.

Hey, let's play Six Degrees...anyone in LA know Eric Balfour?

I like him for PISTOLERAS.

Oh geez, and a HUGE kudos to Brea Grant, the delightful actress we cast as ditzy Pistolera Sophie (Then after a bad equipment test run last spring, we decided to wait and quadruple our budget to do it right, RESERVOIR DOGS style. And thus the more appropriately low budget THE COMMUNE came first. She did this brilliant take on the irritating-friend-who-gets-you-into-trouble that made Sophie adorable and full-blooded...Heidi and I just fell in love, and a huge puzzle piece clicked into place.)

Brea has parlayed last season's FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS guest starring roll into a lead on HEROES opposite Hiro. She's profiled ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY this week. Yea Brea!!!! We knew you were a superhero! Now you get to be a villain, too! So fun.

Crap, does that mean we can't afford Brea any more? :( Back to finding investors...

Okay, and just because it feels so mmmmm to look at pics of him in l'amour:


Wouldn't you be happy if he were in PISTOLERAS, ladies? Phenomenal actor.

For all you skimmers, dammit

Just to be clear...

I have never said I'm moving to Prague.

So you can stop emailing and texting me congrats already!

What I SAID was...

I'm putting my stuff in storage and I'm taking a trip to Prague.

I have no plans afterwards. No apartment rented, no return ticket, nowhere I need to be on any date.

If I like it in Europe and the universe presents opportunities, there's no reason I couldn't stay. Though the job opportunities that I wrote about are in Paris, London, and Venice. Not Prague.

It's just as likely I'll be back in the states.

But who knows where or when.

Capice? D'accord?

Grrrr...

I mean thanks for caring, but cripes!

That other 99% of the population?

They're right here. Breeding.

See now look...

Your opinion on Twitter and other micrologs obliterating blogging depends on whether you have certifiable geniuses in your "friend" lists.* Do I want to know what 99% of the population is thinking at any given moment? I'd pay not to. Do I want to know what Warren Ellis and John Rogers are thinking?**

Bring on the microlog revolution.




*Also depends on if you're blogging to be discovered and make money...which would certainly not put you in the brainiac 1% category anyway, so quit yo bitchin' about the Twitter threat...

**If this were a bad William Gibson movie adaptation starring Keanue Reeves, we would all have microlog chips implanted in our brain and be able to hack into any human's channel...which would cause Keanu to utter his awed catchphrase "Whooooa!" when he picked up David Milch's. Or Mark Waid's.

In case you haven't seen it yet

See, I think the reason my friends are convinced the perfect mate complement to me is a straightlaced Mr. Big business guy who adores me is because, really, if I dated THIS GUY it would pretty much be crossing the streams in GHOSTBUSTERS.


Where the Hell is Matt? (2008) from Matthew Harding on Vimeo.

Dr. Egon Spengler: Don't cross the streams.
Dr. Peter Venkman: Why?
Dr. Egon Spengler: It would be bad.
Dr. Peter Venkman: I'm a little fuzzy on the whole "good/bad" thing here. What do you mean, "bad"?
Dr. Egon Spengler: Try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously and every molecule in your body exploding at the speed of light.
Dr. Ray Stantz: Total protonic reversal!
Dr. Peter Venkman: That's bad. Okay. All right, important safety tip. Thanks, Egon.

Friday, July 11, 2008

Outing artists

While my brother finishes his next piece of brilliance I'm not allowed to talk about, he's outing another local brilliant cartoonist. And so the circle of creative life continues...

Acoustic guitar

Someone is playing in the apartment upstairs. Feels so warm and cozy and beautiful.

That was a great thing on THE COMMUNE set. We had at least 5 guitarists on the crew, and would sit around at night playing and singing and drinking wine. Lovely. That's how I imagine living in Europe is always, hahaha.

Oh! It's AMERICA. A desert on a horse with no name. Mmmmn.

Mr. Danny B Harvey

Awwwwww....just got this message and photo on Myspace from rockabilly guitar legend/THE COMMUNE composer Danny B. Harvey:

"I can't believe I WAS THERE!!! YOU ROCKED,
See Chauntal even scared herself when she saw the playback!"


I've been so blessed to work with and become friends with worldclass artists. I'm a lucky girl.

If you haven't joined The Commune Movie on Myspace yet, please do!!!!

Me, Danny, and Lippie (famous French pop singer)

Thursday, July 10, 2008

God Tim Ferriss is brilliant

I mean, we already knew that, but Jesus. Gotta figure out if he's gay or straight so that we can decide if he's going to marry me or Michael. One of us deserves to be in his life. Spectacular human being. Fantastic life. Siiiigh.

Letting go

Selling my baby grand piano. And here's my Ebay listing for the cherished John Byrne Avengers art. Bid away!

And for the love of Sophocles, will someone come and take a packing/sorting/donating shift? Me tired.

Got guilty pleasure BULLETPROOF MONK on in the background and just heard two of my favorite dialogue bits:

Said in kindness to a dying Budhist monk: "Enjoy your vacation."

"I figured it out. Why hot dogs come in packages of ten and hot dog buns come in packages of eight. See the thing is that life doesn't always work out according to plan. So be happy with what you've got. Because you can always get a hot dog."

Picnic and a movie

I'm gathering a group for VALLEY GIRL this Sunday and A CLOCKWORK ORANGE the Saturday after. Hope you can come hang out!

Wednesday, July 09, 2008

Q & A

Freckles asks regarding adding my AIM account:
Do you have prerequisites? Though we have not formally met, I enjoy reading your blog.


I have made incredible friends first through the virtual world, and eventually we meet and like each other as much in person. Please add me!

Freckles asks:
Do you think there are more or less opportunities out there for women (like me) in the indie film industry?


Less opportunities in the studio environment and more in the indie world.

It's very important to learn your style of management/employment and be the best woman you can be instead of imitating a man. Then I find that men adore working with you and the opportunities are boundless. I highly recommend as a minimum taking Alison Armstrong's first PAX course.

But let me just say...as stalwart femminists...my producing partner Heidi and I had originally intended to populate our set in the reverse ratio: 92% female and 8% male: as a statement, to give women opportunities, to set things right. And we thank the gods every day that that didn't work out.

Men are experts at things that women do not understand: teamwork, loyalty, honor, integrity (getting the job done no matter what). We never had problems with male employees.

And even more than that... If you truly love men, appreciate them, recognize their service, thank them, treat them like gold, tell them what you want and need...

Men are the most amazing people on the planet. I mean Zeus, they LIVE to make you happy and to get you exactly what you want. No politics, no pouting, no games, no undermining... just "What do you want?" so that they can achieve and provide it for you.

Crap, see now I'm getting misty again.

Working with my crew was one of the most beautiful experiences of my life.

In fact, I only "lost it" twice on set. And I didn't really "lose it", I calculated how angry to get to scare people into action...in a momma bear way... and BOTH times it was when my crew was being mistreated. EFF that, not on my set.

Heidi and I as managers ran "The Five Love Languages" on each crew member to figure out how to best show our appreciation (i.e. I'm a gift giver, but if that's not your language of love than that doesn't say "thank you" to you...and if you're my line producer you might actually tell me to STOP giving you gifts...hahahah...) EVERY SINGLE ONE of our guys was SERVICE.

Okay, now I'm crying.


Bill Cunningham is an expert at studying the new film model. So is Eric Escobar. And Mike Curtis. Defintely start reading their blogs.

As far as your first question goes, I met all three of these gentleman first online. Am now friends in the "real" world with the first two, and the third was used by my editor as a consultant on THE COMMUNE. I'm sure I'll meet him soon.

Blogroll

Okay, I've done the heinous task of consilidating all you readers into the Blogroll format on my side panel in the middle. (Because it was actually less heinous than finishing THE COMMUNE website or packing my house. Ah avoidance, my old friend.)

There's even a NEW! feature that will tell you when a blog is fresh. Pretty sweet.

If I missed you and you want to be on the list, then by all means write me off, post mean things behind my back, and pout.

OR...you know, give me the benefit of the doubt that I wasn't personally spitting on you and post a comment here gently reminding me you were excluded.

Ditto for dead links, repeated links, etc.

Phew. That's been on my list of things to do for three years.

Enjoying

Mostly on Indy 103.1:
I’m Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance With You (Black Kids), You Got Your Cherry Bomb (Spoon), There‘s Nothing Like You and I (The Perishers)
Black & Gold (Sam Sparro), No Way Back (Foo Fighters), Hang Me Up to Dry (Cold War Kids), The Only One (The Cure), Yellow Ledbetter (Pearl Jam), Pork and Beans (Weezer), Bend and Break (Keane), I’m Not Over (Carolina Liar), L.E.S. Artistes (Santogold), What a Lovely Dance (Hal), In the Heat of the Morning (David Bowie), Who’s Gonna Ride Your Wild Horses? (U2), Rich Girls (The Virgins), Gold Lion (Yeah Yeah Yeahs), Vanished (Crystal Castles), You Me and the Bourgoisie (The Submarines)

Contact me if you want to see The Deadly Syndrome & Miss Derringer for free at The Hammer Thursday night!

Tuesday, July 08, 2008

I'm Jack's total lack of surprise

Under Bush US Exports to Iran Surge My favorite part: "America sent more cigarettes to Iran — at least $158 million worth under Bush — than any other product." Sigh.

Except YOUR children, of course

Oh lordie, hahaha. Just heard an ad for a TV show called BABY BORROWERS: "It's not TV. It's birth control."

Amen, brother. Preaching to the deliriously happy, childless choir.

See now...

If I were my twin nieces, I would have to go try this...

David Lynch

Guest-hosted Jonesy's Jukebox yesterday 7-7-08. Download it.

Thanks to everyone who picnicked with me at the cemetary to BLUE VELVET on Sunday: Christina, Shawna, Brenda, Stefan and his brother. Felt soooo awesome to be back in the beautiful weather, watching one of my favorites. Hysterically funny. I can now officially say that yes, THE COMMUNE has an audience, and yes, it is my BLUE VELVET.

My LA birthday party is this Sunday at the cemetary watching VALLEY GIRL. Be there or be really freaking lame.

The Saturday after is CLOCKWORK ORANGE, and uh...after that you might not see me for loooong time. So come already, and bring booze and cheese and candles and a pillow for your rump.

The best of the rest



See? It's my BadMotherFucker wallet. I don't kid.

Lyons 2 am


Summer log

Jenn Awesome Oberle

Say no evil

Melissa and Judd

Melinda

Captain Crazypants

Dr. Dave

Dave, Richard and Sabrina

Me and Winter slaving away

Jen and Coral!

Monday, July 07, 2008

Hey now

Didn't mean to catch so many people off guard...the last thing I wanted to do was upset anyone.

But hey, it's me... I'm free as a bird, remember? And um...I think all the talk the last three months about being miserably unhappy here and where should I move to were pretty big hints, right?

Yes, film is my #1 work love, but I can make dissident guerilla films anywhere in the world. Writing is even more inspired when I travel... How much of the world haven't I seen?

And come on now. You know that there is nothing I won't do for partnership and love. THAT'S my number one in life.

It's time. I want someone to be my most special person whom I think of first, and vice versa, and for us to be deliriously happy together.

I'm ready. But I don't see finding that or maintaining that in LA. LA is great for many things, but not love or partnership. It just makes sense for who I am and what I stand for that I'd have to find it abroad, or let abroad get me a step closer.

And I know a spectacular man in Prague whose heart belongs elsewhere unfortunately, but who undoubtedly has wonderful male friends with the same valules, or his woman does, and who knows who THEY know?? It's time to play Six Degrees of Lis's Partner.

Everything else can be done remotely. You guys'll hardly know I'm gone. I might start video blogging. And I've been studying Ferriss's 4 Hour Workweek like mad... I just can't be trapped in bourgeois American problems anymore. Gotta think outside the consumerism box and live life and be happy. Gonna do the things that I wanna do (thanks for my anthem, Weezer!)

But look, who knows, I might haaate it. And then I'll be back.

But no matter what, my life has been shook up and changed and that's great. No more of the bs I've been stuck in. Sorting and giving it all away; the dead family crap and the stuff I bought to insulate myself afterwards. Anything that smacks of a normal life, when we know I wouldn't be happy with a white picket fence and kids.

I'm an EAT PRAY LOVE playful gal, especially with someone I adore to share my life with and stay in bed naked and eat scrumptious French food off of as we giggle and talk and cuddle and tingle and think about heading to a pub or cafe where great friends wait. Just gotta be authentic. Never gonna get there stuck in the American rat race.

Sunday, July 06, 2008

Escape From America

Here's a fascinating article on living off the grid for all my estwhile criminal/mafiosa fans out there. You know who you are. You mother daughter kid sis porn googler sickos. Shhhh. I see you. Now you can quietly go away...

In case you care

I try not to talk about work too much, because long ago I chased away all the snarky wannabe screenwriters who were rude to the cancer caregiver readers, and well...everyone who's left now seems much more interested in what I'm feeling, processing, thinking on any given day than about the Hollywood grind. As it should be, frankly.

So where THE COMMUNE stands is I spent June trimming another five minutes out of it with genius editor Todd, and now the puppy sings arias. Then went to Winter at EMB Studios for the (hopefully) last go-round of sound editing/design, then back to Todd's to compile everything and devise our viral campaign strategies for Youtube, Myspace, and our website. If you want to watch my progress designing our website (FUN! Like chewing glass), you may do so here. Constructive suggestions are welcome, though suggesting I start over from scratch will be met with a firm "Eat me." You've been warned.

In the middle of all this, Brenda is helping me move my shit, er I mean cherished possessions, into storage. I'm in the process of donating or selling over half of everything I own, and am transferring some assets like my car over to her because there's a high likelihood when I go to Prague at the end of the month that I won't be coming back from Europe. You've been warned.

One of my dearest, oldest friends has an empty apartment in Prague and has offered to let me stay there. And another friend has been living there for awhile, and though he'll be gone I'm hoping he'll be a hero and introduce me into his circle of friend, because if they're anything like him I'll be in good hands.

I can't remember if I ever mentioned it here, but Prague has been my #1 destination plan since sophomore year of college, when I heard it was like Paris in the 20s, and had a premonition that I was going to meet my man there. Lest you think I'm under the spell of Oneitis again, my plan is not to marry a Czech for a greencard. I have some other friends who expanded their NYC business to London, and are now going to Paris, Venice, and Japan. So employment opportunities and housesitting jobs are likely. Plus, it sounds pretty simple to get a job under the table at a hostel. You know, killing American tourists.

I have to confess, I got a little nervous today thinking about the European men. Anita reminded me how my guyfriends were pulling them off of me in Spain. It was kind of strange because it was just me. The other American girls were plenty prettier and didn't have drunken buffoons trailing after them for miles or, um, EFFING BITING them. If it's like that anywhere else when I'm traveling alone...I don't know. I'm going to have to figure out the culture fast to discern why I was catnip to them (Too approachable and welcoming? Do I have to be a cold bitch who doesn't make eye contact? I need to bind my breasts and ass?) and how to say in their language "Sorry, I only sleep with a man I love who is committed to me."*

Or maybe I can just lie and say I'm Canadian; avoid the whole American girls gone wild stigma. Traveling alone is such a drag for a woman when you have to spend the whole time figuring out safety issues. That's why it's taken me so long to get to Prague in the first place. I didn't want to go alone.

But, well, I don't have my wonderful traveling partner to explore the world with and make love to every day and eat great food off of, so guess I have to go to Europe to meet him.

And you guys can stay here and worry about the election, gas prices, the recession, and the actors strike. Suckers!

Saturday, July 05, 2008

Rogers!

Damn him. Being all brilliant and political and Canadian, stirring up sh*t again. WHILE HE'S RUNNING A TV SHOW.

Sigh. Whatever. I first became exhausted trying to keep up with this man, what, three years ago? Back when he was just an A list screenwriter/scribosphere blogger who had time to chat with me about Deadwood, Pistoleras and Marxism at Meltdown Comics, and I STILL couldn't process books/articles/comics/blogs/movies/TV as fast as him. Freaking Neo, man.

Wish I could use this post from his blog in my intro letters to managers:

kid sis: Hey Rogers! Don't make a Brazilian porn fart on my wet dream of Underpaid Glorified Dialogue Writer! Zeus knows I can't clean bedpans or fill out insurance forms...

Rogers: For that metaphor alone, you should get an automatic staffing gig.


From his lips to the Hollywood Fairies' ears. Then again, it'd be a lot more adventurous to get some feature polishing gigs and do them remotely from Prague...

Charlie's Angels



I wanna be the smart funny one who's always overlooked!...oh wait...

Friday, July 04, 2008

Thinking in gallons

On the one hand, I'm glad our gas cost is finally catching up to the rest of the world so that we have to think in terms of abandoning Hummers and buying Smartcars.

On the other hand, it's a big bummer on a holiday like today when I have to calculate how many miles away my friends are, and if I can truly afford to reach them.

Remember when we used to just get in the car and DRIVE?

2008 is a milestone year we'll speak of in terms of before and after.

Ah how much we've all aged this year...

And the band played on as The Titanic sank.

Thursday, July 03, 2008

My AIM name

Haven't used my account in the two months I've had it and been ignored by the one buddy I have, but just in case there are some fresh buddies out there:

GoddessHollywood

Wednesday, July 02, 2008

Virtual sniff

Oh I'm having so much fun with this perfume obsession. I feel so womanly and purty! If you could smell me on any given day, you would catch a whiff of:

CHANEL Cristalle ***** citrus chypre
"...morning after feeling. There is a business-like briskness that suggests waking up from a night spent with a gorgeous stranger and finding her fully dressed, and made up, ready to leave after nothing more than a peck on the cheek, leaving only a cloud of Cristalle as a contact address. Beautiful, and a little scary."

LOLITA LEMPICKA ***** herbal Angel
"...as refreshing as lime soda pop...the fragrance is snappy and smart, an ideal accompaniment for flirtatious banter delivered by prim girls in glasses."

ESTEE LAUDER Beyond Paradise ***** symphonic floral
"...Abstraction has always been the soul of great perfumery...hits to perfection the dappled, fresh light of early morning shining on the sort of impossible garden that Swedenborg would have seen in visions and described in detail. Not sure about Beyond, but definitely Paradise."

BADGLEY MISCHKA ***** gorgeous fruity
"...Big, breathtakingly gorgeous fruity top note...hire a caterer - it's love."

PRESCRIPTIVES Calyx ***** guava rose
"...Maintains its perfect balance between crispness and rosy sweetness...incredibly fresh and modern...it's one of thsoe rare fragrances you could wear your whole life."

GIVENCHY Organza **** vanillic floral
"...brings to mind Harpo Marx rapidly outlining an hourglass figure with both hands, letting out a loud finger whistle, and grinning happily..."

-Luca Turin and Tania Sanchez, PERFUMES: THE GUIDE

By the way, today it's BEYOND PARADISE ;) And no shower :(