Tuesday, August 22, 2006

I Wasn't Going to Keep Posting Here

But since most of you probably won't be checking typepad yet, guess I'm going to.

Today would have been Mom's 67th. Dealing with it okay so far. Have packed the day with a huge Pistoleras production meeting, photo shoot, and overnight visit from my dear old friend Charlie (yes, the one who save Mom's life...he's in Mom's Cancer in the beginning as the friend who used his connections to get us to the expert doctor who actually treated Mom).

So clearly denial is still my drug of choice.

Feeling a lot dizzy. Probably hung over from the two beers I had last night. I just can't drink more than one anymore.

Sadness wise...okay. Comes and goes.

Here's how I always like to remember Mom; dancing and singing to Short Skirt and a Looooong Jacket by Cake.

I want a girl with a mind like a diamond,
I want a girl who knows whats best,
I want a girl with shoes that cut,
and eyes that burn like cigerettes.

I want a girl with the right alocations,
Who is fast, and thorough, and sharpe as a tack.
Shes playing with her jewlery,
Shes putting up her hair,
Shes touring the facility
and picking up slack.
I want a girl with a short skirt and a long jacket.

I want a girl who gets up early, (gets up early!)
I want a girl who stays up late, (stays up late!)
I want a girl with uninterupted prosperity,
Who uses a machete, to cut through red tape.

WIth fingernails that shine like justice,
and a voice that is dark like tinted glass,
She is fast, and thorough, and sharpe as a tack.
Shes touring the facility
and picking up slack.
I want a girl with a short skirt and a long, long jacket.

(na na na na.....)

I want a girl with the smooth liquidation, (smooth liquidation!)
I want a girl with good dividends, (good dividends!)
At city bank we will meet accidently, (meet accidently!)
We start to talk when she borrows my pen.

She wants a car with a cup holder-arm rest,
She wants a car that will get her there.
Shes changing her name from Kitty to Karen,
Shes trading her MG for a white, Chrysler LaBaron
I want a girl with a short skirt and a long jacket.

(na na na na na.....)

Monday, August 21, 2006

Buckle Up Baby...

Things are going to stay bumpy for a few more days as I make the switch to typepad. Hold on, kids! Arms up in the air!

And if anyone's successfully archived their blogger account over to typepad, please contact me...I only got 30o posts moved over and don't know how to do the rest.

Thursday, August 17, 2006


Interesting thoughts about the new Catwoman developings.

And here's some well-produced fan films I'm not crazy about because they emulate the Jim Balent Catwoman as low-class stripper motif, and feature a stunt woman with one of the least powerful baby-doll voices ever (you know, the classic "I stopped developing at 12 because my funny-uncle molested me" voice).

Not exactly the empowered Castwoman icon of my youth.

Don't forget to check out the bad art direction in Selina's home. No way would Selina hideout in a dump with an 80's leather couch, cheap tv tray, and halogen lamp that Target stopped carrying in the mid-90's. Wharever happened to her being a chic, stylish lady? Damn Balent.

Sunday, August 13, 2006


Hypothetically, if one were to have a program that allowed one to reproduce any DVD they chose, and one happened to upgrade their computer's tired old USB connection to 2.0, thus reducing the process of this feat from 3 hours to twenty minutes, one might hypothetically be drunk on the god-like power and be reduced to maniacal overlord cackling and outbursts of "Anarchy."

I hear tell.

All of which still has more dignity than yelling "Leroy Jeeeeenkiiiiins!" During public onanism. I hear tell.

The Last Standing Ovation

Apologies to people who've seen it done it are over it.

It's interesting to me that I find Ian McKellen soooo doable KNOWING he's a gay man, yet cringe and lose interest in poor Hugh everytime I see him embodying uncomfortably sissy behavior. Hmmmnn.

Love the fag, hate the fagginess? Guess I like ALL my males to be Alpha.

I mean, COME ON! Yum.

Porn Foley

It's worth it just to see the lav clipped to the shirtless dude's chesthair.

Friday, August 11, 2006


My eyes just turned to goo and melted out of my head. How do I continue to type, you ask? I have sonar-powered flipper fingers and a braille keypad.

Seriously. ZAK PENN is going to write the Avengers movie? He who brought us such classic cinematic gems as Elektra and X3? Will Marvel NEVER LEARN?

I'm sorry, explain to me again why I'm not writing these movies for them for free? Do they think my lovely lady lumps get in the way of my typing?

Because I've got your bad-ass melee starring Iron Man, Thor, Cap, Vision, Hulk, Witch, Ms. Marvel, Hawkeye, Jarvis, Gyrich, Jocasta, Mantis, and any other extras you want to throw in RIGHT HERE in my bad-ass, estrogen-soaked, bleeding once a month BRAIN. And it's bigger than Zak Penn's. Want Ultron? Kang? Shi'ar? Could have had it all.

But now that they've angered me, they're going to have to apologize and give me sexual favors before they get my take on it. And while they're going down on me, I'm going to make them say classic A lines like "We'll follow you through the gates of hell, but you've got to lead us!"

Lis Smash. Lis Assemble.

Lis cast chaos hex spell and make Zak Penn ladies shoe salesman.

Hey Kids, Comics!

Check it out. Great interview with my bud Dallas Middaugh over at the Comics Journal.

Thursday, August 10, 2006

Two Link Ads

One's a good friend, one a Hollywood neighbor.

Ink Destroyed My Brush
Hollywood Threshold Guardian

For future reference, they're down on the right-hand column under "Friends' Sites" and "Screenwriting Resources".

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Needed Humor

Thanks to Ronniecat for reporting these gems:

Star Trek sings Python's Camelot
Trust me, it's worth the loading time.

And Germans' latest form of protest.

Why didn't Americans think of that?

F*ck Cancer

A good friend of the family, and a best friend of Nurse Sis was just diagnosed with bone cancer. She has two young kids.

Thought some of you might be interested in this product. Customized silicone bracelets. Just bought one off a friend in the Armstrong yellow color that actually says "Fuck Cancer." And people have been noticing.

Makes me feel a little better.

Monday, August 07, 2006

Why Don't We Have This in America?

Meg, you have to try this service out and let us know how it is.

And here's a great quote from Cristina Martinez of the band "Boss Hog":

"I think all men should work their tongues out daily, build it up. What am I going to do with a bicep? Give me a strong tongue."

Thursday, August 03, 2006

Hey Guys

Sorry I've been sporadically posting. A weird combo of having inconsistent internet connection the last ten days, and being overwhelmed by writing deadlines...which is a good thing.

Gone into pre-production on "Pistoleras" and it's a little crazy. We start shooting the last week of November in New Mexico, and there's just so much to do between now and then. But it's exciting, and I'm dying to see what the director Sharri Hefner does with the script, because she did a brilliant job with our short.

Phew. Anyway, I'll keep y'all in the loop, but right now I have to finish finalizing the script so we can get it to our awesome graphic artist for the manga. Yikes. Real-world deadlines.

Have I mentioned I've viewed so many Spaghetti Westerns in the last six days, my eyes are bleeding gold bullets? I told the curious Rocket Video staff that I was writing a paper on Marxism in Italian Cinema instead of trying to explain that we're making a revisionist Second Phase European Western from an American Neo Feminist perspective melding Blue Crush and Django Kill. Which is kind of goofy, because if anybody in this town would follow that statement it would be the staff at Rocket Video. Shout out to Joe. Then again, if there were actually anybody capable of stealing this idea, it'd be employees at Rocket Video.

All this movie-cramming and I still want to marry dreamy Charles Bronson. Or at least have a ghost affair with him from noon till three. He's so jolie-laide.

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Vader Sessions

What Kind of Horror Film Are You?

What kind of horror movie are you?

Like Suspiria and Ringu, you're the Foreign Horror Flick! You just love the vision and inspiration that other cultures have when showing the fear that every human has inside, regardless of where they come from. Some people don't understand you, but that's OK, because you know that horror doesn't have to be understood to be felt.
Take this quiz!

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