This is hard, true stuff...at least I find it hard, with all my years of caregiving for others. But it feels great if you do it, and it's a warning sign to pay attention to if not...
Until you know where a relationship is really at - that it's real, that marriage is on the table, that you feel confident, secure, committed,that you feel happy in it nd relaxed, don't do ANYTHING that feels or looks like "Boy" energy as far as he's concerned.
Use your Boy energy to go out and make a million dollars and help save the world. Use your Boy energy to take YOURSELF out for a great evening, a concert, a show, a dinner. Use your Boy energy to ACCOMPLISH something for YOU.
Let a man be the boy energy in your relationship.
So instead of GIVING - let's think of this as RADIATING.
"Girl" energy radiates - love, warmth, peace, sensuality, fun - all the great stuff you want to GIVE to him.
So, if you're just BEING in Girl energy ALL THE TIME with him, you'll be RADIATING and GIVING all the time.
You'll be open, emotionally available when he's around, warm and loving - all states of BEING that don't necessarily mean you have to DO anything about them.
You just ARE.
And when he's around you like that - he gets the message 24/7 that you love him, respect him, and accept him - just as he is.
He'll feel inspired to give to you without feeling afraid that you'll REJECT him.
He'll give to you, and then what will automatically happen is you'll RADIATE even more out of your heart, you'll thank him with your smile and appreciation.
And this is PLENTY giving!
Where we all got steered wrong is in the DEFINITION of giving.
The trick of giving to a man is in giving him what makes him feel good to receive - not what makes us feel good to give.
And the best gift you can give a man is to feel happy.
To let him make you happy.
- Rori Ray www.HaveTheRelationshipYouWant.com