Un-Matrixed

My new (January) laptop imploded on my early last week and will be off to the HP factory for at least 3 weeks. Already has cost me $200 on a machine that was initially only $700...

AND I'm dogsitting and the house abruptly lost its internet connection days ago.

So if you're wondering where I am and can just make out the sonic scream, that's me, stuck alone in the real world...

Join me on Netflix

Hey! I've got 35 reviews and 3000 ratings up...come join me as a friend and we can exchange movie suggestions, share our opinions/ratings, and see what's in each other's queue! And it helps me rise in the reviewer ranks if you vote my reviews as helpful!

C'mon! All the cool geeks are doin it!

Playing to the crowd

I'm babysitting my sister's dogs while she's in Europe (Hero and Stat). They both have separation anxiety and like to be within a few feet of me all day.

I find, as they trail me from room to room like I'm a parade float, that all it takes to turn that frown upside down is WiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiIII-ing like a pig whilst windmilling my arms.


Instant puppy Nirvana.

Huge canine grins and whipping tails.

Come to think of it, maybe that's how I threw my back out.


Well. It's worth it.

Puppy loves chicks

I've managed to throw my back out somehow. Argh.

Here's something to enjoy on this beautiful day I'm holed up inside for. Hero plays just like this:

Nothing to Astrology at all...

Suck on this, scientists:


June 22 to July 22
Traditional Cancer Traits

Emotional and loving
Intuitive and imaginative
Shrewd and cautious
Protective and sympathetic


On the dark side....

Changeable and moody
Overemotional and touchy
Clinging and unable to let go


I'm sorry, is that not me demonstrated over and over on this blog?

Zip it, Big Bro.

Cosmic joke

It's been a looooong time but...

Just got a fishie from Mom.

It was HYSTERICALLY funny. That bitch and her wicked wit. Remember my Gladiator shout-out to her on Mothers Day?

Yeah. She set me up bigtime. I mean, this was a prank nine months in the making.

Fuck. I can't believe I can't tell you all. I mean, it's sooooo juicy. I peed a little texting Nurse Sis about it.

Fuck.

Gotta avoid lawsuits. Shut your lips, Lis.

Sigh. Man, I can never tell you guys the really good stuff.

Well, in case you didn't believe there was an afterlife, take it from me. There is. And a wicked tongue is still highly prized there.

Hello God, it's me, Lis

So God, I think I got in the wrong line before I was born. Would you please trade out brilliance for being stupidly happy?

That would be swell.





By the way kids, hit 1,001 posts today. Hope it's been a good Arabian story for you.

Amazing news from Cannes

Hot off the press; three iconclast directors working on new projects, together! Wow!!!!

Darth Vader attack

I think census takers have found a higher percentage of USA Jedi, if I remember correctly...

Where I will be all night

Calling all movie maniacs?

Present and accounted for.

Simple ways to be the Queen

I'm redesigning my life: finding what I spend my time and money on that makes me the most happy, choosing little pleasures I can incorporate in my week without busting the bank...

So here's my latest splurge:

Cucumber water!

I can get five big ones for $4, which should last me a week of slicing up half a day and putting it in my Brita pitcher.

I feel pampered, the cost is minimal, AND I drink a healthy amount of water. Win, win, win!

Along the above lines, I'm also shopping for an apartment building that has fun people, a pool, and a gym. Socializing, working out, and feeling like I'm on vacation without spending a dime...See how cool this could get?

(by the way, you can also add mint, lime, orange, and lemon to your water, in any combo!)

For Mom

You too! Oh, you don't have one...I'm a doofus. Take luck! Good luck taking care of the luck you might have when you have it...!

And the all-time favorite...Glaaaaaddiaaaator!

I was in Starship Troopers

Way back when I did martial art stunts and weighed 104 pounds.

But not this one...

God I hate Mother's Day

Go treat your moms like gold, will ya?

Lucky bastards.

And the Emmy Goes To...

I've studied every industry-valued hour-long television show this year (and last year, and the eight years before that...and please, no "I wish I had your job" comments; it is extemely difficult to do and in NO way resembles turning off your brain and being a couch potato).

Would you like to see the hour-long episode that will win "Outstanding Writing for a Drama Series" in September at the 60th Annual Primetime Emmy Awards? You can for free at ABC.com

"The Becoming"
Grey's Anatomy
First aired: 5/8/2008
Season 4 Episode 14
Editor: Susan Vaill (luv you girl!!)
Writer: Tony Phelan, Joan Rater

Trust me. I know television like I know the beat of my heart. (Hmmmnn...or could it be it's soooooo relatable to my life right now? Nah...Okay, c'mon. It's at least going to be nominated!!)

Freaking phenomenal work, Tony and Joan. Quotable, life-changing, observant, brave and bold. Felt like the series, but expanded the series and the characters. Just amazing and fantastic and incredible and other superlatives.

And no not-gentle readers, it's not The Wire or Battlestar Galactica, but get over it...Emmys aren't given to genre shows. See Buffy and The X-Files, subtract genius Darin Morgan.

2009? Go John Rogers!

Wait, what? Leverage is a brilliant, funny heist action show? Aw crap. Sorry, Rogers. Looks like House pulls into the lead again, by a deviated septum...

Oprah's best American sandwich day

Seems apropos...

I've been meaning to blog about "Grey's Anatomy" because it's felt off to me for years, and then last week's episode was suddenly sublime...and now here I am on a Friday night at abc.com watching the May 8th episode, again returned to its first season glory, and the second I saw the two soldier actors my heart turned upside down because they are both EXACTLY my type. Those soulful puppy dog eyes filled with yearning in a testosterone-fueled body...Jesus.

So imagine my surprise when at 14 minutes in, they started passionately kissing and...

Oh. Oh. Oh...

...I realized I wanted to be in a sandwich between all that male goodness?

I mean a heterosexual devil's triangle is a huge "Duh!" for me (all the more to be adored? hell, add a third hunk with roving hands and tongue!) but a passionate gay 2 male sandwich fantasy?

Huh. Learn something new every day.


Too bad in reality I'm such a True Love devotee and STD fearer...

I blame Catholic school. Again.

Damn you, Sister Mary Margaret Ann!

The Commune Trailer

Brand Spankin' new.

It's got all your family values.

For you LA Animators...

Academy has a cool show Friday night for artists on animation. I'm not going, but with a $3 ticket, someone should!

My friend Chrissi Coppa

Ah, so proud of her! Check out her amazing Storked! column over at "Glamour." Hot, lady!

She's due back from vacation in two days, so be sure to visit her then. In the meantime, look at the hunky online entertainment she's wrangled for us:

Matt with J.D.

See, something for everyone! Even us non-Mommies to be have something to smile about...even if my life still looks a little more like the day I met Christine three years ago. :)

Space Nazis

I'm intrigued by the stylized trailer and the music.

Post Female American Cinema

Oh siggggghhhh... No female protoganists because there's no female directors! No, because there's no audience! No silly, because there's no material!!

Yeah. How about that mandate from Warner Brothers?


Rented "Girl 27." Really brave examination of insitutionalized rape in the studio system, and the general attitude towards girls and sexuality and their disposibility to Hollywood businessmen. Not that anything's really changed here...The first half of the movie is really good and the last half is pretty bad, so I guess it's a draw unless you turn it off 45 minutes into it. Yikes. But fantastic subject matter, even though they ran out of material.

Hometown lovin

I'm sorry, but who's the Santa Rosa &*!$ who keeps hopping here for 4 seconds?? What could you possibly read in 4 seconds??

Gods. I'd expect more love for a hometown girl in the big city. 100% bounce rate my big bubble butt...Sweatin' here for nothing...Grrrrr!

The ol' dump and run

Do better

Do better by me

And maybe we’ll see

If you’re alive in there still

Or dead on arrival

My healing powers are not so great that I can save

A boy killing himself in front of me

For the fun adventure of dying alone again

The better to never be a Man

Channel your guilt

From CSI: Miami, episode "Tinder Box".

HORATIO
You okay? What's the matter?

RONNIE
I'm going to resign. Wanted you to be the first to know.

HORATIO
Ronnie, you could not have prevented what happened in there.

RONNIE
All those souls, Horatio.

HORATIO
I understand that, but we need more good men, not less. And now more than ever. You know that.

RONNIE
The guilt...

HORATIO
Ronnie, the guilt keeps you sharp. It makes us better. Will you at least think about this?

RONNIE
Thanks, Horatio.

Nick Fury

Ah yeah. Nick is always enjoyable. Not my favorite, but still delish. All that righteousness and purpose, ha ha.


If you have no idea what the Marvel Universe is, but stayed through the end credits of Iron Man (above if you didn't, mais ouis), you'll recognize Sam in the middle of this montage. Nick's been drawn as him for years now, ever since The Ultimates. Looks like Avi knows how to use The Law of Attraction...

Maybe Charles should redraw Pistoleras with movie stars...whaddya think, Charles?

Avengers

Well, an Avengers movie is coming...three years from now. Ugh. Think the inner kid in me just died.


They should've been more ready than that. No surprise Iron Man is a hit. Not with that script and cast...so three years??

Disappointing.

I'm cautiously okay with it being The Ultimates universe, though.

I may have learned to read on my brother's Byrne Avengers, but time marches on. Everything but the Hollywood paycheck now belongs to Bendis.

Iron Man

I'm pretty sure I actually came.

You can ask all the Arclight men around me who were thrilled with my squealing.

Yes, I was the grinning ninny wandering around Sunset afterwards in the throng of mensweat with a dazed look in my eyes.

Well done, Marvel Studios. Smoke a cig on me.

Hey, kid

Am I going to see the Academy's Tribute to Robert Evans and screening of Rosemary's Baby?

Yes.

Am I happy about the five dollah ticket price?

You betcha.

Do I have an overwhelming urge to sleep with legendary lothario Robert Evans?

Ur...no. Sorry, Bob.

The Kid stays in her clothes.

That Fies Family humor...

So when I emailed an unnamed smartass relative for being the d*ck who ruined me by sharing David Caruso gossip, this was the response I got back:


Did I ruin CSI: Miami? Or did CSI: Miami.........

ruin YOU? (puts on sunglasses)


YEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!



Yup. We won't get fooled again indeed. But what am I to do now with a Tivo full of this crap? All I hear now is Shatner, and see Caruso NOT picking up props or crossing thresholds and randomly running out of scenes. WTF. Thanks, unnamed relative.


By the way, Rose Brut at 4 am? Delicious.

Betty Carter said Open the Door

Really? Sure sure Mcgruff, you talk big...

Open the door, dear.
I must get in your heart!
You're making it hard
to be true

So please, come open the door, dear
And then, perhaps, you'll find
you've had me on your mind.

No matter
how you tried to avoid me,
you can't get away so easy
If you will not come to me I'll come
to you

Open the door, please.
Why make me beg and beg?
Why torture me
like this?

Can't you see,
I've got love,
plenty love to give you.
I've got love,
lots of
love to give to you.

I've got love...

I'm still so in love...

with James McAvoy. Dang.

Great eyes, presence, thoughts on his face. And the way he makes love to his women onscreen. Delicious.

This BBC Macbeth is the bomb! Oops...just went soft. Oh, that's okay. I can forgive an out of focus shot. At least it's creative and well-acted.

Yeah. James. Ah, shirtless again. Thank you thank you.

So one of my best friends and I are Gmail chatting right now, and he won't let me post anything we're saying. I'm sorry. I promise it would've amused you. He's suggesting a trip to the store for Ben & Jerry's.

Could I be more excited about...

Chronicles of Narnia
The Happening
Sex & the City
Indiana Jones
Iron Man
The Hulk 2
Hellboy 2
Step Brother
Wanted
The X-Files
and The Dark Knight

Wow. Just...wow.

Nerdopolis

People have already started booking me two months in advance for the amaaaaazing summer movie season. And I've got three dates for Iron Man, which is perfect. I already know I'm gonna love it. The big O.

The curse and blessing of being such a geek goddess. I'm just glad my enthusiasm while watching doesn't bug my friends. Poor Josh usually laughs more at me than the movie...

Expect many more opinions like I had for X-Men 3 and Star Wars 3 "Star Wars 2" was before I was a blogger, but I fell asleep on Dr. Dave when Yoda started fighting using the force in anger, so guess that says it all.

Neil Diamond

Can't believe I'm watching "American Idol." Blame Nate for standing me up staying late at work, ha ha ha...Couldn't possibly be my bad TV taste ;) But I've got good food taste; eating a fat Banana Split Sundae. Hells to the yeah. Life is for living.

God I still love Neil Diamond. He's got that number one quality for me in a man: sweetness. Love love love.

What's your fav song of his? They didn't do mine: "Longfellow Serenade". Pretty obscure choice out of his oeuvre. Here's my favorite verse/chorus of it:

Longfellow Serenade
Such were the plans I made
But she was a lady
As deep as the river
And through the night, we stayed
And in my way, I loved her as none before
Loved her with words and more
For she was lonely
And I was lonely
Ride, come on baby, ride
Let me make your dreams come true
I'll sing my song
Let me sing my song
Let me make it warm for you
I'll weave this web of rhyme
Upon this summer night
We'll leave this worldly time
On his winged flight
Then come, and as we lay
Beside this sleepy glade
There I'll sing to you
My Longfellow serenade


Ha ha, I quoted Wordsworth in The Commune and no one's gotten it yet. I wandered lonely as a cloud.

Ah, romantics are all but extinct...we've been bagged and tagged and left for dead.

But that David Cook...he's pretty dreamy, huh. Singing All I Really Need is You. Cagey, man. Good music arrangement again. He's one smart competitor. I don't know if I trust his sweetness. A little too calculated. I really liked his Billy Jean performance a month ago, though.

Wha-huh????!!!

I don't visit Facebook that often because I don't want constant updates on my exes and men who've rejected me. Funny thing about that, I find Facebook and Myspace make women messy. Seem to be designed to bring out low self-esteem in women so that the one night standers can swoop in for the pickings.

But after almost a month of not signing in, guess what was waiting for me?

A Facebook message from a guy in Singapore who says "I'm a huge fan, love your performance in The Commune, please add me as a friend!"

Oh, and I can see from his profile he works for MTV Networks.

?????????????????????????????????????????????????


"The Commune" isn't out anywhere. We've sent it to Cannes and LAFF, and been effin' anal about destroying copies (only Heidi and I have one) and know exactly who we've shown it to. Because I'm nobody's fool, and pirating kills small independent filmmakers.

Three possibilities are in my head right now:

1. The movie was thrown in the trash by someone at LAFF or Cannes, and some smart fast pirater rummaged through the DVDS and picked ours. Edited out the "For Screening Purposes Only" - tagged scenes and released it in Asia and I should kill myself now. Just take a running leap off a building.

2. This man has not seen my movie.

3. This man was on a screening committee for either Cannes or LAFF, indeed does like my film, and is my first unknown unsolicited movie fan.


#3 would be very cool. Although it still makes me a feel a little weird and exposed (literally...at least he didn't say "great rack!" because I can't tell you how wigged I'm going to be when that starts), it also gives me great great hope and a tiny ounce of pride.

Like this blog and me in general, I don't hold back the truth...the movie goes straight for the jugular, and I imagine it will get A's and F's from people who see it.

So...wow. Someone who didn't know me Loves it.


Cool.



Oh shit!!!! I just thought of a fourth disappointing possibility....He saw "Conventioneers" and mistook me for the lead actress....Oh, that's possible. I look like Woodwyn in the poster. Yeah, that's possible.

Cool

By the way, being called out by Showrunner/A-list screenwriter/blog god John Rogers was just too cool not to mention.

Read to the bottom, or you'll miss his killer "hey".

That guy is just so stellar as a writer and a human being. I thought I was a freak about inputting articles and TV shows and movies to build a better writer, but that man misses NOTHING. I don't think he sleeps. He's like Neo downloading martial arts. And still has RAM left over to tell us what's wrong with our dang US political system. Must be something in that Canadian water.

Did I ever mention the Thanksgiving I spent at Mark Waid's house with Mr. Rogers and Tyler Mane from X-Men, a dozen other Illuminati members, and of course Mark's copious collection of DC toys and comics and original art??? My lord. I'm such a lucky, lucky, fangirl.

You know, he actually recognized ME once in Meltdown comics instead of the other way around...that's how cool he is.

Ohhhhhh...

Oh...... I. Am. So. Angry.

You don't want to see me angry.

I'm serious. You don't.

Ask the two dozen people who've ever actually seen me angry. I turn people to stone. Twice on my set when people f*ked with my hard-working crew. Once in college when I thought my car had been stolen.

I wanta put my fist through a f*king wall right now and bust every knuckle.

WHAT. AM. I. DOING.

Seriously.

I'm Lis F*cking Fies.

You all know that.

Why don't I?

I'm sitting on a contests-winning beloved sexy young action superheroine screenplay that could no joke be sold TOMORROW for a half million dollars. Easy.

Easy.

Don't believe me? Look again.

I'm afraid to put it out there because I'm afraid they'll offer me too much to take it away from me and I won't be able to say no. I'll sell out. And they'll give it to Brett Ratner to direct. Don't believe me? He bought "I am Vanessa Delgado" and shelved that feminist manifesto. Poof! Gone. Like it never existed.

But I'm sure that female screenwriter has a good career now, script-doctoring.

And what am I doing, besides festering?

I'm letting myself live in squalor. In fear. In scarcity.

Accepting love crumbs from 24-year-old boys. Not EVEN crumbs from Hollywood.

I'm not even in the f*cking game.

Why? Because I could win it.

Because if I asked for it, there's a possiblity the studios might actually let me direct Pistoleras.

I'm good.

I'm ready.

I've prepared my whole life for it.

I'm being a pussy.

And I'm treating myself like some loser reject.

I don't have my own back.




F*king balls.

Grow a pair, Miss.

Unacceptable.

Union

Did it! I'm a PAX graduate. Through the curriculum for the first round. Absolutely life-changing.

The coup de grace of PAX programs is their Sunday panel of men, where they bring in ordinary, non-prepped men for us to ask questions of...and their answers always stunningly verify everything we've been understanding/listening/learning. It's always so pure and inspiring, and a room of 140 people ends up crying and thanking each other and it's a big appreciation lovefest.

The panel of men this afternoon was beautiful, stunning. They're always so thrilled to be there contributing to us, letting us celebrate them, providing for us. Love it.

Men's reactions to me all weekend have been amazing. I'll blog some specific stories later in the week.

I'm pretty tired, and obviously didn't explain what the workshop was about very well in the last PAX post. It was a class dissecting marriage from the historical perspective, the DNA-driven compulsion, from men's wants and needs and finally from a paradigm of partnership. All so you could have a real choice about if you ever want it for yourself (I need committment/partnership, but not necessarily a piece of paper).

I was given tools to separate all the chatter and judgement and righteousness that's been thrown at me as a woman since I was three. I was shown a marriage I could emulate. I let go of failing to live up to my grandparents' hopes that I would marry young and well and conform to what is "right". I was given choices and empowered, and fell in love with men all over again.

Don't be freaked out by the word Mahwage.

We're committing to partnerhsip with ALL the men in our lives; brothers, co-workers, friends, all of 'em. They're getting empowerment space from me no matter what. No sniveling; they get to be their best selves around me and all the PAX women. Seen and appreciated and accepted.

And finally, after five months and five classes, I was given peace about why things went wrong with Jeremy. I feel like I can forgive myself. I was doing the best I could, and wow did I have the wrong information and training.

The good news is, I actually met a man who had the minimum requirements of a partner to make me happy, and that I had the 12 things he and all men are looking for. He just didn't know I had #8 because I was trained to hide it by a stupid romance coach from the internet. Flat out hid #8 from Jeremy to not scare him off, when it's the thing that would have told him we could be together.

Okay. This is good news. Really. Especially for a woman with a head injury who had given up on every being able to be a man's partner. The reality is, I met one man who I loved the ME I was around him, and I'll meet more. I don't have to live in a scarcity model. There's no "The One". By definition, if there was only One and he was THE one, how could we not be together?

Looking at my past relationships, I don't know that I've ever been committed. It was all so wrong. What a healing. I just can't wait to get my life in freaking order so I can do this, be a fantastic girlfriend/partner. Meet my Lifetime Playmate. Partner in Crime. Avengers United.

#8. Wow. I was that close. Should've known. Self-expression is a value of mine. I should never hide anything I need or want.

Not even that I wear a retainer every night because I grind my teeth. Sexy, huh. Well...someone out there just might think retainers are cute.

Alright, Jeremy ruminating over. Now that I know how it happened that we were such a great connection and why it didn't go all the way, I can recognize a great potential partner next time and be at cause in committing. That's all I wanted. To understand. I fell into something great accidentally, fell out of it as accidentally. Felt disempowering to not be at cause. But now? I understand.

"If you cause it, you can cure it" is an old medical saying. I have a blueprint now for a lifetime of happiness.

I am content. I can have compassion for myself now for where I frakked up.


Can I share one last thing I've never told anyone?

It's...I don't know WHAT to make of it, except that it was radiant, and I want it to happen again for the rest of my life.

Jeremy was a really amazing human. A total hero.

Arranged his whole life so he can do grassroots political work for underdogs. Goes to D.C. as a totally regular young guy to change laws. He never asked my age or where I grew up, but he wanted to know what charities I volunteered for, how I was using my life to make the world better.

He's a good man. I was behind him 100%. I would have arranged my life to make our partnership #1. I still support his dreams, his vision for the future, and think we could have been fantastically happy in a little green apartment in San Diego riding shotgun in a 25-year old Asian car (I drive one myself and love it), travelling together to the Middle East to fight for their rights and making documentaries. I accepted every part of him and his life and respected him and wanted to be a part of it.*

And I was a queen around him. Just totally at ease, confident, self-expressed, fun empowered. Glowy. He made me the happiest I've ever been in my life. Best sixteen hours ever.

Okay, so that's the part I havent't blogged.

Here's the part I haven't told anyone. Because it's just so...I don't know. To have done this and then been dumped the next morning like a one night stand...too vulnerable of a thing to admit. But I liked who I was, no matter what judgement you have about it and me, so here goes:

When we were together that night, all night, the whole time...he would lay this string of kisses on my body. Worshipful. Totally sacred. And whenever he paused, I would do it back to him. And each single kiss, I thought:

I love you.



*That would be #8. The thing relationship "experts" out there often tell women to hide. That I would be happy to be in the man's life and thrilled to make room for him and give up the Hollywood career and things I'm doing while biding the time until I meet my partner. Because partnership is my value and my #1 committment, and independence is what I do in the meantime to survive in this world. (And I can make dissident guerilla films ANYWHERE.)

If you want to learn the other 11 things men need to have in a relationship in order to marry a woman, TAKE THE COURSE!

It's one of the top five most important things I've ever done. I am SO PROUD of the work I've done and who I can be in the world now for everyone I love.

Lisa Tenzin-Dolma's "Union" 6 of Chalices card from The Glastonbury Tarot Deck

Vigilantes

What's your stance? I'm pro. Obviously.

Catwoman thesis, Pistoleras, Impact self-defense, martial arts a decade ago. I believe in keeping the pack in line by any means.

Embarrassing confession #476

It's not my birthday.

Sometimes I forget that I'm not just talking to myself, that there are people out there READING this stream of consciousness...

Anyway, for the last eight years I've started the b-day countdown three months before my b-day. Trying on the new age, worrying, stressing, picking my life apart for all the things I was supposed to accomplish by that age. You know, because Welles made Citizen Kane at 25, and a ton of people have won Oscars and Gold Medals and been published before they were 30, and surely dozens of people have won the Nobel Peace prize by 35, and if I wasn't going to accomplish any of that than I should AT LEAST have bagged a husband and 2.5 kids by my next b-day.

So...for those of you wishing my a happy b-day...I'll accept it as it is my b-day SEASON. No need for well-wishing again on June 23rd.

Bloodshot eye

Man, my right eye is throbbing. Popped it reading Charles's manifesto against "The Killing Joke."

Taking the last of the PAX classes this weekend. Long day today. Great day. Great insights. Gorgeous weather. Awesome women. Man, I'm going to have such a killer relationship with some lucky guy soon. So happy.

This last one is Celebrating Men and Marriage. I'm not a huge marriage gal. Am a huge monogamy/committment gal. But haven't really dated in years. Pertubes my family and friends and society...thus earning me constant disapproval... which then effects the quality of my relationships with men, my self-esteem, my ability to empower my men and be at cause...

Great class. I'll blog more soonish.

Moving vote

1 for Sillicone Valley (5 guys to every girl and they love Tina Fey)
1 for Vasquez Rocks

Uwe Boll gotta eat

OMG. The freakin' cursed Ender's Game movie has lost Wolfgang Peterson. Poor poor Orson Scott Card. Will he ever see his masterpiece on the bigscreen? Will he want to if the talback jokesters at AICN have their way and nominate Ratner or Boll to helm?

Could be worse. At least, according to Boll, he's not "a fucking retard" like Michael Bay or making the same shitty movie like Eli Roth.

Hmmmn.

Stay tuned...by the time this movie is made, we'll have a new Hegemon...


By the way, the links above? Totally worth your giggle time, even if they aren't new.
And if you're an aspiring filmmaker, you can always enter The Uwe Boll Movie Challenge!

Hollywood Classifieds

I kid you not. This Hollywood industry ad truly is "standard":

Probably decent pay of $600-$650/wk with standard hours til about 7:30 PM or so.

Going rent for a questionably safe area One Bedroom in Los Angeles? $1600.

Does the above job come with medical benefits? No sirree.

So let's think about this...$2400-$2600 a month. With taxes out, let's average everything and say you take home $1800.

But your low-estimate monthly expenses are:

car insurance: $200
medical insurance: $300
gas: $200
food: $300
RX: $120
cell phone: $60
storage: $150
cable/internet: $100
water/gas: $75
Job related networking, classes, books, parking, PR, gifts, lunches: $500
credit cards: $900

See the problem?

Approximately $4500 with no frills or cushion and living in a mediocre-bad apartment in a mediocre-bad area of town. No vacations, concerts, massages, haircuts, pedicures, clothes, no paid parking space at home...but worse, working in a job from 9-7:30 that would leave me no time for outside networking or creativity.

Yikes. I mean, basic survival in LA is overwhelming and not maintainable for years for me, and doesn't leave room to really advance my career.

If I get two roommates in NoHo, I might be able to pay $700 a month for rent and split water/cable. So if we call basic living expenses $750...I can get monthly expenses to start more in the $2700 range. Without a cushion for car repairs, classes I have to take, the trips up to NoCal to edit, screenwriting contests to enter, the film festivals to enter and hopefully attend...I'd still be going $900 more into debt every month.

Yup. Looks like I need roommates or a 400 square foot studio with a hotpad and better credit.

Happy B-day Lis! This year you're turning 22. Again.

Ah, the glamour of pursuing your dreams. Jealous?

Thursday inspiration

“The man who never makes a mistake always takes orders from one who does. No man or woman who tries to pursue an ideal in his or her own way is without enemies.” -Daisy Bates

"The strongest single factor in prosperity consciousness is self-esteem: believing you can do it, believing you deserve it, believing you will get it." -Jerry Gillies