Sunday, April 27, 2008

Embarrassing confession #476

It's not my birthday.

Sometimes I forget that I'm not just talking to myself, that there are people out there READING this stream of consciousness...

Anyway, for the last eight years I've started the b-day countdown three months before my b-day. Trying on the new age, worrying, stressing, picking my life apart for all the things I was supposed to accomplish by that age. You know, because Welles made Citizen Kane at 25, and a ton of people have won Oscars and Gold Medals and been published before they were 30, and surely dozens of people have won the Nobel Peace prize by 35, and if I wasn't going to accomplish any of that than I should AT LEAST have bagged a husband and 2.5 kids by my next b-day.

So...for those of you wishing my a happy b-day...I'll accept it as it is my b-day SEASON. No need for well-wishing again on June 23rd.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey, you accomplished quite a lot! You started your media company, Shero Films. You already have three films, including the Conventineers (on DVD now).

People like Orson Welles were rare. Like you, I go through something similar. It does not do any good to compare myself to someone else. Best to compare myself to the person I was "X" years ago.

Josh said...

This is something I've suffered from as well, and I've dubbed it Tenenbaum Syndrome. It's extremely hard when you're an exceptional child, then student, then college student, then award winner, and so on, where the rewards for your genius are always clear and tangible, and then SUDDENLY you're here in the zany madcap world of Hollywood, where there really are no clear-cut definitions of success, or if you have such definitions, they seem hard to attain.

Just remember that we tend to hear lots about those freaks who sold their first script at age 25 because those are seductive Hollywood stories, but we don't tend to hear about those who worked hard for a decade before having massive success.

Furthermore, I agree with Anonymous that YOU have achieved an enormous amount - more than most people can claim. It's probably hard to see from where you stand, and also because there's more you want to achieve, but I hope you are proud of your accomplishments, which were achieved by vision and sheer force of will.

Josh said...

This is something I've suffered from as well, and I've dubbed it Tenenbaum Syndrome. It's extremely hard when you're an exceptional child, then student, then college student, then award winner, and so on, where the rewards for your genius are always clear and tangible, and then SUDDENLY you're here in the zany madcap world of Hollywood, where there really are no clear-cut definitions of success, or if you have such definitions, they seem hard to attain.

Just remember that we tend to hear lots about those freaks who sold their first script at age 25 because those are seductive Hollywood stories, but we don't tend to hear about those who worked hard for a decade before having massive success.

Furthermore, I agree with Anonymous that YOU have achieved an enormous amount - more than most people can claim. It's probably hard to see from where you stand, and also because there's more you want to achieve, but I hope you are proud of your accomplishments, which were achieved by vision and sheer force of will.