Thursday, July 21, 2005

sex, lies, and omissions

*humming* Been caught stealing...So I spent a crap load of money on books at an unnamed chainstore. Somewhere in the neighborhood of $250 for my summer reading. Drop in the bucket for my addiction. should have been more like $310.

See, they had this sale on, and I walked up with about 18 books. The clerk rang them all up, got confused about the 4 for 3 or 3 for 2 or whatever thingie. Made me go around and show him all the sale books to confirm that the ones without stickers were actually on sale. Then stood in front of the cash register with a blank look on his face for an eternity. The whole thing took about twenty minutes of my life I'll never get back (not counting the queue), but when I lugged out of there with my stash I had "accidentally" saved an extra sixty bucks.

Not a twinge of guilt. I'm a moral person. But I'm not that moral. There are limits. I won't BS you and say I frequent the store so I deserve it, or they owe me for being corporate bastards destroying the planet, or that the books are marked up anyway to cover that sort of thing. No. I stole. And I liked it.

Anyone else have a confession of immorality? Stealing only please. The sex tag was just to "sell" the post to ya. And reference my favorite move of all time.


John Donald Carlucci said...

I used to train bookstore people (at a popular chain when I lived in LA) and you do deserve that extra books. I was frustrated by many of the dimbulb cashiers who couldn't get a job that wasn't brain surgery - and I was the trainer. I can image what it is like for you the shopper. This is one of the many reasons I buy online now.


Anonymous said...

I don't steal, but I do tell lies on occasion.

And just make stuff up. Like the time I had this convenience store clerk convinced I was from England. I put on an accent and went in there, I think, about every day. He treated me like a Queen, anglophile that he was.

Does that count? I suppose I stole his confidence. Which he missed, when I turned up one day with no accent and looked at him like he was crazy when he asked if I was English.


Christina said...

I once had a characature done at Six Flags and the guy gave me too much change. I went back to find him and didn't so I spent the money on games at the park.


American Knight said...

A slightly minor infraction occured while at the con this weekend. When Iw as paying for some books at one of the dealer booths I purchased about 13 bucks worth of comics, gave the guy a 20 and after he gave me my change and I walked to get some food I realized the guy gave me 17 bucks in change.

Kid Sis said...

JDC - Yeah. I know. But you can't flip open a book online. When I know I want it, I definitely just go through Amazon. But then I'm so cheap I have to wait for the SuperSaver shipment to arrive, and by then it's SOOO anticlamatic (whoa. another word I have no idea how to spell). Thanks for another reason why I deserved it...but I really didn't. Immorality is immorality, whether Zeus is watching or you deserve it or not.

NN, definitely counts. Men's egos are fragile, baby! Cherish them like a little chirping hatchling!

Christina, you count too.

AK, that's exactly what I'm talking about! Minor infraction. Someone's in denial :)

dakotablueeyes said...

lol If he was smart he would have known what he was doing. So since he had no clue then You deserved to save that extra $60 woohoo.

Anonymous said...
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Kid Sis said...

DBE, thanks! Checked out your blog...hope your luck picks up! I hate car accidents.

MQ, again, EWWWW. Save it for your site...I said no sex! Yeah, the screenwriting books are a bit of a scam. Better to go to the library if you must read them.

John Donald Carlucci said...

MQ: I hate that one. Isn't that one where she says to write the title page on day one?
You write a script in 21 days by writing.

Isn't that the term for when you are disappointed in clams?


Kid Sis said...



See, i can use

Making fun of the injured. Nice one.

Matt Reynolds said...

Hell yeah, I used to be big on stealing stuff. Shoplifting was a bit of problem for me between the age of 15-24. I'm serious. I once almost got caught in London when I stole a R2D2 toy that made these really cool sounds from Woolworths.

I'm almost ashamed to admit it but I was 22 at the time. The store detecive followed me up the road as I was playing with the toy and asked me: "Did you take that." I wasn't at all convincing when I said, "Er,no."

But amazingly, he let me off. I quit soon after that.

John Donald Carlucci said...

It wasn't until you said 22 that I almost spit soda!


American Knight said...

Denial? I admitted to said infraction it's not like it was 60 or 70 bucks ya know...

Martin said...

Free books, eh? Sounds like heaven to me.

Care to give us some titles?


Anonymous said...

My roomate has a bread machine, one of the best inventions ever. Put in the ingredients, set the timer and in the morning you have warm fresh baked bread. Only problem is the yeast is on the expesnive side, so we go to safeway and they *donate* yeast every now and then. Immoral? Not when you wake up to fresh baked bread.


Brookelina said...

The bookstores get what they deserve! They pay those people about 7.00 an hour while they rake in billions. Screw em!

Zzakk said...

I always turn in found wallets stuffed with cash, then feel dumb because I can't afford to eat.
Only stealing I do is drugs.
Well, just pot.
Then I get the munchies and wish I had kept the wallet full of money.
Life is fun like that.

Anonymous said...

I regularly, routinely and chronically steal from movie theaters as much as is humanly possible.

I have been using my student ID for the better part of a decade after graduating college. I intend to continue this practice into my 50's.

I go to as many free "double features" (sneaking into a 2nd show after paying for the 1st) as my schedule will allow.
Insider Tip: Make sure you
go to a large theater like AMC
Burbank or Reseda, where you
can park forever.

I buy senior citizen tickets at the ticket kiosks. I've done this 5 times and was only turned away once.

And so's my not so subtle form of revenge against the evil corporate theater chains. Rising ticket prices, being assaulted 20 minutes of shrill commercials, etc.

Until they abolish commercials and lower their prices, my rebellion will continue!


Kid Sis said...

What a fun topic. Thanks everyone! We all need a spanking.