Well, it's just the way it is around here...we've been living on a see-saw for years now. For those of you who haven't experienced cancer, trying to follow Mom's health updates gives you a good feel for it. Is she or isn't she...Who knows?
Nurse Sis estimated Mom's chances of pulling through on Wednesday around 50/50. Then Mom was clear-headed and much better yesterday, not obtunded like the day before. Still having a hard time breathing, but Nurse Sis stayed all day with her to get her meds right with the doctors and watch them like hawks (their constant questions and mistakes were driving Mom nuts). But she was with it enough to comment on the consistent beauty of everyone taking care of her (and no rings!). Can definitely see why Brad Pitt et al hang out there when they're "dehydrated from exhaustion." Mom referred to the eye candy as "Bubblicious" and suggested Nurse Sis work there instead of her current hospital. Oh, that rascally Mom.
Big Bro arrived in the evening, and that cheered her up immensely. But aparently she had a rough night last night and her heart rate dropped way too low. They were waking her up every forty-five minutes to check her vitals. They might tap her lungs today to relieve a half liter of the fluid there, or they might wait. Visiting hours are just opening up, and Big Bro is there already. I need to take Nurse Sis' checkbook to her work, then I'll be going to the hospital. So, who knows? Her spirits are low again.
For those of you who were marveling at the amount of reading I get done, my biggest scoop is that there's really nothing else to do at a hospital. It's too rude to bring my laptop, so I bring scripts and books. Yesterday I read Dogs of Babel, and today I'll probably read Bruce Campbell's. Anxiety levels are high; you have to find some way of occupying your mind so you don't start eating or doing something else destructive.
Also, I clocked myself for the reader who asked. I read in the neighborhood of 75 pages an hour, so I can finish the average novel in 3-4 hours. Because I'm reading an hour before bed every night (TV is all reruns, and if I don't reset my brain I have either insomnia or terrible nightmares), it's quite simple for me to read a book and a half a week. Probably not the vacation you all thought it was. But certainly doable. You just need a sick loved one!
Amanda, thank you for your kind email...I am watching my spoons. I've been exercising an hour in the morning and an hour at night, so that helps the anxiety levels. Has a weird effect of making me eat only once a day, but when I do eat it's healthy fresh veggies and lean meat. But I'm feeling stronger and better than when I was doing the doughnut binge and sleeping too much. How to drop six pounds in a week...again, you just need a sick loved one!
I'm going to a book signing tonight of a friend of a friend. Good book, too. So I have that to look forward to. And I'm still editing Mom's autobiography. That will occupy me for at least another week.
Take care everyone, and thanks for the positive thoughts!