Sunday, June 15, 2008

This makes me feel sad

It's a lovely, touching generous offer. Everything a woman wants. Every time I read it I get sadder.

Poor guy. If only life were that simple. If only hearts and chemistry worked that way. What Los Angeles woman wouldn't feel cherished by this offer? (Minus the sleazy Craigslist-meet/prostituion feel of it). The bolds are mine:


Reply to:
Date: 2008-06-15, 12:32AM PDT

Broken up and broken down about a girl I was totally in love with and I can't take living alone. Anyway, I'm looking for, searching for, hoping for, a young, pretty, female who is somewhat "normal" in shape, not insane; someone to dote on and care about, whom I can take care of, be with, maybe even fall in love with. If you think that I am placing this ad simply for the sake of having a sexual partner, you are mistaken. I want complete conpanionship and that includes emotional bonds.

So, if you're stuck with no place to go and don't mind a creative, attractive male vs. a refrigerator carton as a companion, please email me

I'm a writer and artist. Daniel Day-Lewis looking. Intelligent, sane, in shape and considerate.

I'll pay all the rent, all the utilities, room and board (food, etc) and I will do special things for you (buy you flowers on occasion, write you poems) to make you feel wanted and needed.

Please send a photo and describe yourself. Tell me what you want/need... Please be serious and reliable. In return, shall make you the most special person in my life.


Anonymous said...

I'll bet you 1st, last month's & security deposit that this guy doesn't really look like Daniel Day-Lewis, at least before a bowling pin rampage

Kid Sis said...

I'm betting we can also rule out sane.

japhy99 said...

Check out the one I found on my area's craigslist while searching for a vintage bike:

Maybe these two could hook up?