Wednesday, June 28, 2006

God Willing, I Don't Have an Egg Left

Oy, Kathy Griffin makes me laugh and laugh. This week's episode:

"I don't like children. I think they're selfish. If I accidentally got pregnant, I would definitely have the baby and then give it to Jessica. (Kathy's personal assistant)."

"A lot of women must want to give them back. I can't believe my mom kept me."

"Clair (Kathy's 16-year-old niece) is a big disappointment. She's nothing like me. She's caring, nurturing, and she actually wants to cook dinner."


And about her recent trip to Iraq to cheer up the troops:

"There's something so liberating about being an American woman sleeping in Saddam's palace. It was so like I just wanted to vote...I was just like walking around having my period on the floor like 'Fu*k you. Nobody tells me what I can do, I'm an American woman, fu*k you."

10 comments:

Lynda said...

I stopped watching Suddenly Susan when she left the show.

She is a riot.

ronnie said...

Unbelievably good stuff :)

Another person who's refreshingly honest about children is Florence King, who makes me laugh and laugh but who I am not supposed to enjoy anymore because it turns out she's anti-feminist, or racist, or anti-human rights, or something, I can't remember what, now.

Anyway, I read a quote somewhere in which she says (greatly paraphrased) that she didn't like children, even as a child; and she was slightly disgusted and upset to learn, at around the age of seven, that she was one of them.

The awful thing is that when I read it I immediately recognized having the same feeling.

I got over it, largely. My nieces and nephews I love with a passion so intense I would cheerfully murder anyone who so much as appeared ready to do them harm; and it goes without saying that they are the most brilliant, artistic and beautiful human beings on the planet.

But I can't help thinking of newborn infants as sort of... white elephants. They're marvellous things. Amazing creations, really. But...

...what on earth would one do with one, when one got it home?

ronnie

Meg said...

Ronnie, me too! I remember a lot of moments where I tried to pass as an adult...even though it never occured to me that being four feet tall would probably prevent me from doing so...

ronnie said...

Meg, are you an only or an oldest child by any chance? I find those of us who wanted to "pass" as adults tend to be one or the other :)

ronnie

Meg said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Meg said...

I'm the oldest...I wonder if there is something to that theory.

ronnie said...

Aha!!!!!

;)

Lynne said...

I love Kathy Griffin. I saw that episode. I find that I like kids less and less as I get older. I loved my own kids, though, and it is important to know that your own kids get on your nerves in a different way that other peoples' children do. It's quite a different thing. (like changing diapers...it's awful to do if the child belongs to someone else...and not so bad if it's yours)

Just in case y'all someday change your mind and want kids...these facts (or these opinions of Lynne) may help you make a critical decision. :)

Kid Sis said...

Yes, I'm sure I would love the smell of their poo. Thanks for that. :)

I'm the youngest, but also sort of an only child because of the large age gap. What does that say about me, besides that I'm enraged when people treat me like I'm 8?

sewarf said...

I've got to agree with lynne. I'm not a kid person, but I ended up with one anyway, and dealing with my daughter is awesome--I truly love being a parent. Dealing with my SIL's daughter...not so much...