Saturday, December 19, 2009
Friday, December 18, 2009
Social Media 2.0 Faux Pas
I've committed some doozies in the last five years of blogging for y'all. But it would appear my most egregious error was committed today, on the deceptively innocuous Facebook.
I was in the comments feed, which have been updated to a stream to more closely resemble Twitter. A diabolical layout, it turns out.
Thought I was on my buddy, longtime Kid Sis reader and fellow screenwriting funny person Josh Greenberg's feed. He left a disgusting update joke about Miggs in Silence of the Lambs throwing snot at Clarice...
But see it turns out, hahaha, and THIS is where things get funny, kids...I WASN'T leaving follow up jokes under Josh's disgusting comment.
So how things looked:
JOSH:
After a friend coincidentally named Liz told him that wasn't snot, volley-eth JOSH:
Then I wittily piped in with
LIS FIES:
And sat back and waited for the hilarity to ensue.
Only it didn't. Twenty minutes later, miffed Josh hadn't responded in kind, I went back to the comments feed page and found my comment WASN'T THERE under Josh's. Que?
So I wrote an equally disgusting follow up accusing him of deleting my previous post (which I've now deduced isn't actually possible to do on Facebook) and telling him that Freud was right, all women really wanted their own free silly putty dispenser like men had. To rub on their breasts.
Ten minutes later, impatient for my volley to be returned, I GO to Josh's homepage. Nothing! Wow, what an ahole! How DARE he delete me???
Somehow by the grace of Zeus, I go looking through the Friendfeed comments again. And find my comments have indeed posted. To the Facebook friend Directly. Underneath. Josh.
This MAY be one of the more effed up things I've ever done.
Let me set the scene, Gentle Reader.
Imagine, if you will, you're an innocent revered acting coach in her fifties who has posted this encouragement to your clients/readers:
DALLAS TRAVERS:
And underneath it apropos of nothing appears:
LIS FIES:
And then a follow up accusing her of deleting my previous funny post that mentions silly putty and Freud and my 36D breasts.
OOPS.
Juuuust waiting for the esteemed Ms. Dallas Travers to do what she must, and delete me from her Facebook friends.
Though Dallas DOES say on her info page that she believes in "fun and fulfillment," so maybe my faux pas will just eek by with the proper apology. Apologizing is exhausting. Imagine how Tiger Woods feels!
(Though, in my defense, Dallas DID have three "likes" from her readers...one of them MIGHT have been for me, The Innapropriate Poster (soon to be a Ten Till One sketch on Saturday Night Live))
I blame you, Josh Greenberg.
Okay, so...Not really ladylike behavior on my part. I can take responsibility for my fallout. See, I thought comedian Steve Harvey's love advice to women on Oprah was to Act like a Man and Think Like a Woman. Guess it was Act like a woman...
But what's funny about being ladylike? Nothing. Absolutely nothing.
Chelsea Handler isn't classy & she's dating head honcho at E. Maybe I should keep being myself: lewd, swearmonkey, Inapropriate Poster.
Oddly, this whole apologue translated perfectly in the 140 character world of Twitter. Here's what some of my Twitter virtual friends said:
Lynda's an oooold Blogger friend from the beginning whom I finally met in person this last summer in our hometown Santa Rosa. But the other gentlemen don't know me and have no reason to be nice just cuz...so maybe I'm still doing okay as me.
What say ye, Blogger world?
-Lis "classy and chic like Coco Chanel" Fies
RETRO BLOGGER WAY BACK MACHINE: Oh, and what was I posting about almost exactly a year ago? Another hi-larious Larry David's Sister moment. Worth reading. Happy effin' Holidays.
I was in the comments feed, which have been updated to a stream to more closely resemble Twitter. A diabolical layout, it turns out.
Thought I was on my buddy, longtime Kid Sis reader and fellow screenwriting funny person Josh Greenberg's feed. He left a disgusting update joke about Miggs in Silence of the Lambs throwing snot at Clarice...
But see it turns out, hahaha, and THIS is where things get funny, kids...I WASN'T leaving follow up jokes under Josh's disgusting comment.
So how things looked:
JOSH:
"In Silence of the Lambs, isn't it gross when Miggs throws his snot at Clarice? I can't think of anything more disgusting than throwing snot."
After a friend coincidentally named Liz told him that wasn't snot, volley-eth JOSH:
"that doesn't make any sense - if it's such a maximum security prison, then why would Dr. Chilton let Miggs play with Silly Putty?"
Then I wittily piped in with
LIS FIES:
"I wish someone would explain to me why men have so much more snot than women, and how it keeps ending up on my breasts. Seems like every man I date always has a cold. And I thought gentleman carried monogrammed hankies! I should write Miss Manners..."
And sat back and waited for the hilarity to ensue.
Only it didn't. Twenty minutes later, miffed Josh hadn't responded in kind, I went back to the comments feed page and found my comment WASN'T THERE under Josh's. Que?
So I wrote an equally disgusting follow up accusing him of deleting my previous post (which I've now deduced isn't actually possible to do on Facebook) and telling him that Freud was right, all women really wanted their own free silly putty dispenser like men had. To rub on their breasts.
Ten minutes later, impatient for my volley to be returned, I GO to Josh's homepage. Nothing! Wow, what an ahole! How DARE he delete me???
Somehow by the grace of Zeus, I go looking through the Friendfeed comments again. And find my comments have indeed posted. To the Facebook friend Directly. Underneath. Josh.
This MAY be one of the more effed up things I've ever done.
Let me set the scene, Gentle Reader.
Imagine, if you will, you're an innocent revered acting coach in her fifties who has posted this encouragement to your clients/readers:
DALLAS TRAVERS:
We are all faced with a series of great opportunities brilliantly disguised as impossible situations. -Charles Swindoll
And underneath it apropos of nothing appears:
LIS FIES:
"I wish someone would explain to me why men have so much more snot than women, and how it keeps ending up on my breasts. Seems like every man I date always has a cold. And I thought gentleman carried monogrammed hankies! I should write Miss Manners..."
And then a follow up accusing her of deleting my previous funny post that mentions silly putty and Freud and my 36D breasts.
OOPS.
Juuuust waiting for the esteemed Ms. Dallas Travers to do what she must, and delete me from her Facebook friends.
Though Dallas DOES say on her info page that she believes in "fun and fulfillment," so maybe my faux pas will just eek by with the proper apology. Apologizing is exhausting. Imagine how Tiger Woods feels!
(Though, in my defense, Dallas DID have three "likes" from her readers...one of them MIGHT have been for me, The Innapropriate Poster (soon to be a Ten Till One sketch on Saturday Night Live))
I blame you, Josh Greenberg.
Okay, so...Not really ladylike behavior on my part. I can take responsibility for my fallout. See, I thought comedian Steve Harvey's love advice to women on Oprah was to Act like a Man and Think Like a Woman. Guess it was Act like a woman...
But what's funny about being ladylike? Nothing. Absolutely nothing.
Chelsea Handler isn't classy & she's dating head honcho at E. Maybe I should keep being myself: lewd, swearmonkey, Inapropriate Poster.
Oddly, this whole apologue translated perfectly in the 140 character world of Twitter. Here's what some of my Twitter virtual friends said:
@djallg00d @kidsis LOL she'll forgive you cuz it's friday and you're hilarious
@JoshGorfain @kidsis I wouldn't ask for anything different!
@Hello_Kuma @kidsis I love you to pieces for all those reasons.
@lovelylynda @kidsis You can delete your comment. :)
Lynda's an oooold Blogger friend from the beginning whom I finally met in person this last summer in our hometown Santa Rosa. But the other gentlemen don't know me and have no reason to be nice just cuz...so maybe I'm still doing okay as me.
What say ye, Blogger world?
-Lis "classy and chic like Coco Chanel" Fies
RETRO BLOGGER WAY BACK MACHINE: Oh, and what was I posting about almost exactly a year ago? Another hi-larious Larry David's Sister moment. Worth reading. Happy effin' Holidays.
Police Find Boy, 4, Wandering Streets Drunk Wearing A Dress
Oh thank Zeus, someone's found my child! I donated an egg a few years back, and I've been walking the earth drunk like Caine ever since to find him...
Police Find Boy, 4, Wandering Streets Drunk Wearing A Dress
Police Find Boy, 4, Wandering Streets Drunk Wearing A Dress
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Tuesday, December 08, 2009
The Financial Consequences Of Safe Sex
The Financial Consequences Of Safe Sex
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Poll: Over Half of Ex-LATers Say Print Newspapers Are Doomed
Poll: Over Half of Ex-LATers Say Print Newspapers Are Doomed
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Monday, December 07, 2009
Jazz-Hands Kitty
Jazz-Hands Kitty
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Sunday, December 06, 2009
Thursday, November 26, 2009
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Friday, November 20, 2009
Help my friend!
Rent my good friend and (Emmy Winner!) Barbara Stepansky's feature debut HURT...available everywhere and a new release last week!
And check out this amazing blog entry to get a glimpse into the mind of a film director as works on her second movie.
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And check out this amazing blog entry to get a glimpse into the mind of a film director as works on her second movie.
Share
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Our friend is in the news!
Blake is one of the people behind the Atlanta Horror Fest, and a big supporter of THE COMMUNE. Yea, Blake! Congrats on the cool profile article!
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Monday, November 16, 2009
Sunday, November 08, 2009
Hey men, want to get polled?
Who of you awesome married men knew on the first date or within the first month-ish that she was the woman for you? I need to hear your opinions...providing your experience will save me energy and heartbreak in the dating world and help me understand you magical XYs.
Thank you! Appreciate your sharing, you love heroes!
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Thank you! Appreciate your sharing, you love heroes!
Share
Friday, November 06, 2009
How do I get someone to read/buy my script/logline/great idea?
I'm often contacted by people outside of LA in other fields who have read some of those pipedream screenwriting books (written by out of work screenwriters) and are now confused as to WHY they can't get anyone in Hollywood to read or buy their script, logline, great idea that only needs to be fleshed out into a screenplay.
This is, of course, the equivalent of me walking into a surgeon's office and asking to scrub in on their next surgery: frustrating, insulting, and people get angry when you take the scalpel out their hand and tell them they haven't done any of the schooling and work they need to be qualified.
I hope the following honest answer helps explain the REALITY of the film industry today so that y'all stop emailing me and my friends. Because dealing with this BS has gotten beyond old.
Dear "New Screenwriter" Working in Another Field Not Even Living in LA,
If you read the trade magazines like Variety and Hollywood Reporter you'll see that A-list screenwriters are not able to sell a script in this economy.
(And if you aren't reading those trades daily you've already failed the first daily chore you need to do to call yourself a "screenwriter".)
Studios are closing, they are all making less pictures, and the people who used to be able to make money in this town are packing up and leaving. It's turned into a game of Survivor out here the last two years since the Writer's Strike and the recession.
Nothing is better in LA than it is in the rest of the country. And it's certainly WORSE than whatever chosen career you are currently practicing, but trying to escape through writing.
I can't name one person I know who knows someone who has sold ANYTHING in over two years. We are not getting read or getting meetings either, and our agents and managers are dropping us.
These are friends, classmates and former co-workers of mine with Academy awards and Emmys, a rolodex of contacts, several film school degrees. We have all joined the union, paid off 50-100k of film school student loans, and put in our fifteen to twenty years of Hollywood shit work "paying our dues". We've all also actually committed to living in expensive and soul-sucking LA; often at the expense of having a normal life with marriage and kids.
We are all astronomically more deserving of being read than YOU.
And all of us are going bankrupt.
I would suggest putting your screenplay in a drawer and waiting out the economy several more years like ALL OF US living in LA.
Or make your movie yourself where you are. There are many websites and books out there that can steer you towards how to raise the money and produce and distribute it yourself! But be warned...you will lose your life savings and possibly your marriage. Just like the rest of us.
And for gods' sake, STOP buying screenwriting books, going to bogus expos, pitch sessions, and entering screenplay contests. When there is that much information and "opportunity" out there to join the Gold Rush, it's because THERE'S NO GOLD LEFT.
Entrepreneurs got rich selling shovels to prospectors. THE METAPHOR IS APT.
And if you don't like my advice and think I made it all up to spite your dream and your vision board...Go pay an out of work screenwriter-turned guru script consultant a lot of money to blow smoke up your ass. You'll find hundreds desperate to do it because it's how they afford their apartment rent and late-model Hundai payment. Or just check the Writer's Guild stats and see for yourself that the average screenwriter makes less money annually than a manager at McDonald's.
If you love writing more than your current job and know in your heart it's your calling and it's easy to get paid for it...Might I suggest the flourishing career of journalism? I hear they're opening fancy newspapers every day and lobbing Pulitzers at anyone. The NY publishing industry too, if you have a great novel inside you. The best place to find a Full-time Writer to ask for career advice is at the unemployment office.
Good luck,
Elisabeth
P.S.
Oh, but it's different advice in one case: if you're downloading movies and books for free off the internet. In that case, great ideas and first drafts are all Hollywood is looking for! Sell your car and cash in your retirement and pay thousands for a script consultant. Immediately. And start buying lottery tickets.
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This is, of course, the equivalent of me walking into a surgeon's office and asking to scrub in on their next surgery: frustrating, insulting, and people get angry when you take the scalpel out their hand and tell them they haven't done any of the schooling and work they need to be qualified.
I hope the following honest answer helps explain the REALITY of the film industry today so that y'all stop emailing me and my friends. Because dealing with this BS has gotten beyond old.
Dear "New Screenwriter" Working in Another Field Not Even Living in LA,
If you read the trade magazines like Variety and Hollywood Reporter you'll see that A-list screenwriters are not able to sell a script in this economy.
(And if you aren't reading those trades daily you've already failed the first daily chore you need to do to call yourself a "screenwriter".)
Studios are closing, they are all making less pictures, and the people who used to be able to make money in this town are packing up and leaving. It's turned into a game of Survivor out here the last two years since the Writer's Strike and the recession.
Nothing is better in LA than it is in the rest of the country. And it's certainly WORSE than whatever chosen career you are currently practicing, but trying to escape through writing.
I can't name one person I know who knows someone who has sold ANYTHING in over two years. We are not getting read or getting meetings either, and our agents and managers are dropping us.
These are friends, classmates and former co-workers of mine with Academy awards and Emmys, a rolodex of contacts, several film school degrees. We have all joined the union, paid off 50-100k of film school student loans, and put in our fifteen to twenty years of Hollywood shit work "paying our dues". We've all also actually committed to living in expensive and soul-sucking LA; often at the expense of having a normal life with marriage and kids.
We are all astronomically more deserving of being read than YOU.
And all of us are going bankrupt.
I would suggest putting your screenplay in a drawer and waiting out the economy several more years like ALL OF US living in LA.
Or make your movie yourself where you are. There are many websites and books out there that can steer you towards how to raise the money and produce and distribute it yourself! But be warned...you will lose your life savings and possibly your marriage. Just like the rest of us.
And for gods' sake, STOP buying screenwriting books, going to bogus expos, pitch sessions, and entering screenplay contests. When there is that much information and "opportunity" out there to join the Gold Rush, it's because THERE'S NO GOLD LEFT.
Entrepreneurs got rich selling shovels to prospectors. THE METAPHOR IS APT.
And if you don't like my advice and think I made it all up to spite your dream and your vision board...Go pay an out of work screenwriter-turned guru script consultant a lot of money to blow smoke up your ass. You'll find hundreds desperate to do it because it's how they afford their apartment rent and late-model Hundai payment. Or just check the Writer's Guild stats and see for yourself that the average screenwriter makes less money annually than a manager at McDonald's.
If you love writing more than your current job and know in your heart it's your calling and it's easy to get paid for it...Might I suggest the flourishing career of journalism? I hear they're opening fancy newspapers every day and lobbing Pulitzers at anyone. The NY publishing industry too, if you have a great novel inside you. The best place to find a Full-time Writer to ask for career advice is at the unemployment office.
Good luck,
Elisabeth
P.S.
Oh, but it's different advice in one case: if you're downloading movies and books for free off the internet. In that case, great ideas and first drafts are all Hollywood is looking for! Sell your car and cash in your retirement and pay thousands for a script consultant. Immediately. And start buying lottery tickets.
Share
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Good Clean Love TM
In some effort to be hip and female-centric, the gift bag from the La Femme Film Festival last weekend included a lubricant sample and brochure subtitled "Making Love Sustainable." Every girl's dream!
OF COURSE the inside is filled with enough information about all the other dangerous cancer-causing lubricants on the market to make my pubic hair curl. I only wish I could toss out my cancer-causing Rabbit vibrator AGAIN!
So Good Clean Love lubricant claims that most personal lubricants are made with the same ingredients found in hydraulic brake fluid.
That's just for starters. There's four pages of this stuff that concludes with "the vast majority of both OTC and Adult intimacy and topical sexual enhancement products are made with ingredients invented for industrial uses, not for the most sensitive tissue in the body. Many women have allergic responses to these chemicals that create itching, burning and pain with intimacy."
Don't know if any of their claims are true, but thought I'd pass it on for you to check out for yourselves. My gynecologist is a mensch, a friend, one of the worlds best obgyns, and has been giving me oil changes for twenty years...I'll ask him next month when I'm due for a pit stop.
Thank GOD I get to report I've had sex this year. I couldn't take another long unhappy stare from Dr. H. I do think he's come to terms with the prospect of not delivering any babies for me, but man he hates it when I haven't had sex in a year. He's even qualified to say stuff like "your mom wouldn't like you being unhappy." Between him and that psychic who told me I was going to give myself cancer if I didn't start having sex regularly...like a single gal needs more voices in her head!
By the way, a little tip a girlfriend told me last year: if you get too wet to feel your man, use a condom the first and/or second time you have sex and it will help absorb your natural lubricant and you'll be able to enjoy sex. Then the third time don't use a condom, and you'll be coming together.
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OF COURSE the inside is filled with enough information about all the other dangerous cancer-causing lubricants on the market to make my pubic hair curl. I only wish I could toss out my cancer-causing Rabbit vibrator AGAIN!
So Good Clean Love lubricant claims that most personal lubricants are made with the same ingredients found in hydraulic brake fluid.
That's just for starters. There's four pages of this stuff that concludes with "the vast majority of both OTC and Adult intimacy and topical sexual enhancement products are made with ingredients invented for industrial uses, not for the most sensitive tissue in the body. Many women have allergic responses to these chemicals that create itching, burning and pain with intimacy."
Don't know if any of their claims are true, but thought I'd pass it on for you to check out for yourselves. My gynecologist is a mensch, a friend, one of the worlds best obgyns, and has been giving me oil changes for twenty years...I'll ask him next month when I'm due for a pit stop.
Thank GOD I get to report I've had sex this year. I couldn't take another long unhappy stare from Dr. H. I do think he's come to terms with the prospect of not delivering any babies for me, but man he hates it when I haven't had sex in a year. He's even qualified to say stuff like "your mom wouldn't like you being unhappy." Between him and that psychic who told me I was going to give myself cancer if I didn't start having sex regularly...like a single gal needs more voices in her head!
By the way, a little tip a girlfriend told me last year: if you get too wet to feel your man, use a condom the first and/or second time you have sex and it will help absorb your natural lubricant and you'll be able to enjoy sex. Then the third time don't use a condom, and you'll be coming together.
Share
Monday, October 19, 2009
My Parents Were Awesome
I love this site! Thanks to Fishbowl LA for pointing it out:
"Pictures of parents being young and amazing, before ungrateful children sucked the life out of them. Photos of your own parents being awesome can be submitted to myparentswereawesome@gmail.com - be sure to include names!"
My Parents Were Awesome
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"Pictures of parents being young and amazing, before ungrateful children sucked the life out of them. Photos of your own parents being awesome can be submitted to myparentswereawesome@gmail.com - be sure to include names!"
My Parents Were Awesome
Shared via AddThis
Friday, October 16, 2009
I'm now a Pretty/Scary movie reviewer!
In addition to still being 6th ranked at Netflix! Out of zillions. ;)
My PARANORMAL ACTIVITY review, detailing how PA embodies both genders' greatest fear.
My TRICK 'R TREAT review. Rent it. Fun movie. And Michael Dougherty has been tweeting me back. Cool guy.
My HAGSTONE DEMON review. Mark Borchadt is back and he's sexy! Found this movie at the Atlanta Horror Fest, where it won the Buried Alive award.
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My PARANORMAL ACTIVITY review, detailing how PA embodies both genders' greatest fear.
My TRICK 'R TREAT review. Rent it. Fun movie. And Michael Dougherty has been tweeting me back. Cool guy.
My HAGSTONE DEMON review. Mark Borchadt is back and he's sexy! Found this movie at the Atlanta Horror Fest, where it won the Buried Alive award.
Share
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
The Commune screening THIS SATURDAY, October 17th!
Really hope you can make it! Our last LA screening:
La Femme Film Festival
4 pm
Renberg Theatre
LA Gay & Lesbian Center
1125 N McCadden Place
Los Angeles 90038
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La Femme Film Festival
4 pm
Renberg Theatre
LA Gay & Lesbian Center
1125 N McCadden Place
Los Angeles 90038
Share
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Thursday, October 08, 2009
Wednesday, October 07, 2009
Thursday, October 01, 2009
Cut from LA INK...
And on the fourth anniversary of Mom's death no less. Wah-wah.
Here's the pic Corey took of me:
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Atlanta Press Release
Actress Adrian Lee returns to her hometown for Atlanta Horror Fest's feature screening of THE COMMUNE, a psychological thriller ripped from the headlines about a 16-year-old trapped on her estranged dad's commune for the summer. The Huffington Post says THE COMMUNE is "highly recommended".
Filmmaker Lis Fies and actress Adrian Lee will be in person at the 11 pm screening Friday October 2nd, the anniversary of Executive Producer Barbara Fies's death. It is also Adrian Lee's birthday. Lee is thrilled to see her movie play in the Plaza Theatre, the same moviehouse she watched movies in as a child.
Filmmaker Lis Fies and actress Adrian Lee will be in person at the 11 pm screening Friday October 2nd, the anniversary of Executive Producer Barbara Fies's death. It is also Adrian Lee's birthday. Lee is thrilled to see her movie play in the Plaza Theatre, the same moviehouse she watched movies in as a child.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
update!
I'm all crewed up for Thursday's shoot with Steve De Jarnatt (too freaking cool, I'm producing something by my hero!). But I'll have more opportunities coming up in October.
The Commune is playing Beverly Hills mid October at La Femme Film Festival, and October 2nd at 11pm at the Atlanta Horror Fest. Yea!!!!! Hope you can go see it!
Speaking of Atlanta, want to donate air miles so I can go to the Atlanta Horror Festival for THE COMMUNE screening10/2? You get a Thank You in the final credits!
The Commune is playing Beverly Hills mid October at La Femme Film Festival, and October 2nd at 11pm at the Atlanta Horror Fest. Yea!!!!! Hope you can go see it!
Speaking of Atlanta, want to donate air miles so I can go to the Atlanta Horror Festival for THE COMMUNE screening10/2? You get a Thank You in the final credits!
Monday, September 21, 2009
Crewing up!
Thursday shoot in Burbank with two known Hollywood writer/directors.
Low pay, one day.
We need an asst camera (who can utility crew) 100.00 /day
Dolly grip/general crew $100.00
wardrobe/prop wrangler no pay
EDITOR $400.
Low pay, one day.
We need an asst camera (who can utility crew) 100.00 /day
Dolly grip/general crew $100.00
wardrobe/prop wrangler no pay
EDITOR $400.
Thursday, September 17, 2009
The Forecast Calls for Implausibility
From Ebert's review of Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs. He only gave it 2 1/2 stars, but if I were the filmmakers I'd be pretty proud to have given a critic like Ebert the following experience:
"Let me search my memory. I think — no, I'm positive — this is the first movie I've seen where the hero dangles above a chasm lined with razor-sharp peanut brittle while holding onto a red licorice rope held by his girlfriend, who has a peanut allergy, so that when she gets cut by some brittle and goes into anaphylactic shock and her body swells up, she refuses to let go, and so the hero bites through the licorice to save her. You don't see that every day."
"Let me search my memory. I think — no, I'm positive — this is the first movie I've seen where the hero dangles above a chasm lined with razor-sharp peanut brittle while holding onto a red licorice rope held by his girlfriend, who has a peanut allergy, so that when she gets cut by some brittle and goes into anaphylactic shock and her body swells up, she refuses to let go, and so the hero bites through the licorice to save her. You don't see that every day."
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Power Rangers infamy
Okay, you asked for it. Here's one of my stunt jobs as a villain on second season of Power Rangers.
Guess which one I am. Hint: "Your power now belongs to Lord Zed."
Yes. I am a proud Woman In Suit.
At 4:39 I almost died.
They said "Run until you see the edge of the cliff, then stop." But I had Puttys flipping all around me and only a two inch eye hole to see out of, and it was down by my navel. See the edge of a cliff as I run? Not likely. Fun times.
During that spring I played Stag Beetle, Invenusable Fly Trap, and Octophantom. All bad-to-the bone villains. Even posed for Stag beetle's action figure, which I still have Mint In Box.
I would come home to find phone messages from my roommate like "Jxxx called, he needs you to destroy the Power Rangers tomorrow."
Season 2 ended and they went off to Australia to film the feature film with local stunt performers. I never heard from The Power Rangers again.
As Octophantom I stole the Green Power Ranger's powers. It was at the height of the show's worldwide popularity, and it was "THE" storyline. Kind of a big coup for me. To be feared and hated by children everywhere.
(Don't fret little ones, Tommy became the White Ranger, and then you had a whole round of new Bandai toys to buy.)
By the way in case you don't know the history of the Power Rangers circa season 2, Bandai took the Japanese show that was already taped (Super Sentai Zyu2) and built American stories around it, reshooting as little as possible. I'm in the fill-in scenes, which are easily identified by the different tape stock and coloring. In between takes we'd throw the old footage up on the monitor and come up with the choreagraphy for the fill-in scenes. Let me tell you, those Puttys were the meanest bunch of badasses you would ever want to meet. Don't eff with an Australian or American stunt man; they will cut you, bitch. They were just starting to import the crazy Korean stuntmen who were my exact height and weight (5'5 104) when I left the show.
That's spectacular Olympic medalist Shellie Blanks as the Yellow Power Ranger; the closest we get to American royalty in martial artsland. Oh, how the stuntmen swooned over her. The amazing Sophia Crawford (Buffy stunt double)is in Pink. She's had a very long and terrific career. Had a hell of a time keeping up looking like Sarah Michelle Gellar as the lollipop look came into Hollywood and the actresses got below a weight that sustained muscle mass (i.e. aneorexic). Impossible for a healthy stunt woman to achieve a matching body shape.
Great gals. Shellie recognized me a decade later in a Tae Bo class she was leading and came right over in the middle of it to say hi; super kind human.
Did I mention it was 105 degrees and I was doing martial arts encased in several feet of foam? Yeah. There's a reason I weighed 104 pounds back then. That reason is NON-UNION.
Whatever. I was a stupid kid and I was getting my shot at taking over the world in neon green. In hindsight, I'd do it again.
Years later in my hometown, some guy was going around saying he'd slept with the local girl who was a "star" on Power Rangers. He meant me. He made the mistake of saying it to a friend of mine and she flat out called him a liar, and we never heard about him again. My family and friends all laughed pretty hard at that, because I'd only had two boyfriends and honey he was not one of 'em. If I remember correctly I was like "Wait, WHO?? Have I MET him??"
Only thing more pathetic than claiming stunt work on Power Rangers as the highlight of your life is lying about sleeping with the girl who did stunt work on Power Rangers as the highlight of your life.
Guess which one I am. Hint: "Your power now belongs to Lord Zed."
Yes. I am a proud Woman In Suit.
At 4:39 I almost died.
They said "Run until you see the edge of the cliff, then stop." But I had Puttys flipping all around me and only a two inch eye hole to see out of, and it was down by my navel. See the edge of a cliff as I run? Not likely. Fun times.
During that spring I played Stag Beetle, Invenusable Fly Trap, and Octophantom. All bad-to-the bone villains. Even posed for Stag beetle's action figure, which I still have Mint In Box.
I would come home to find phone messages from my roommate like "Jxxx called, he needs you to destroy the Power Rangers tomorrow."
Season 2 ended and they went off to Australia to film the feature film with local stunt performers. I never heard from The Power Rangers again.
As Octophantom I stole the Green Power Ranger's powers. It was at the height of the show's worldwide popularity, and it was "THE" storyline. Kind of a big coup for me. To be feared and hated by children everywhere.
(Don't fret little ones, Tommy became the White Ranger, and then you had a whole round of new Bandai toys to buy.)
By the way in case you don't know the history of the Power Rangers circa season 2, Bandai took the Japanese show that was already taped (Super Sentai Zyu2) and built American stories around it, reshooting as little as possible. I'm in the fill-in scenes, which are easily identified by the different tape stock and coloring. In between takes we'd throw the old footage up on the monitor and come up with the choreagraphy for the fill-in scenes. Let me tell you, those Puttys were the meanest bunch of badasses you would ever want to meet. Don't eff with an Australian or American stunt man; they will cut you, bitch. They were just starting to import the crazy Korean stuntmen who were my exact height and weight (5'5 104) when I left the show.That's spectacular Olympic medalist Shellie Blanks as the Yellow Power Ranger; the closest we get to American royalty in martial artsland. Oh, how the stuntmen swooned over her. The amazing Sophia Crawford (Buffy stunt double)is in Pink. She's had a very long and terrific career. Had a hell of a time keeping up looking like Sarah Michelle Gellar as the lollipop look came into Hollywood and the actresses got below a weight that sustained muscle mass (i.e. aneorexic). Impossible for a healthy stunt woman to achieve a matching body shape.
Great gals. Shellie recognized me a decade later in a Tae Bo class she was leading and came right over in the middle of it to say hi; super kind human.
Did I mention it was 105 degrees and I was doing martial arts encased in several feet of foam? Yeah. There's a reason I weighed 104 pounds back then. That reason is NON-UNION.
Whatever. I was a stupid kid and I was getting my shot at taking over the world in neon green. In hindsight, I'd do it again.
Years later in my hometown, some guy was going around saying he'd slept with the local girl who was a "star" on Power Rangers. He meant me. He made the mistake of saying it to a friend of mine and she flat out called him a liar, and we never heard about him again. My family and friends all laughed pretty hard at that, because I'd only had two boyfriends and honey he was not one of 'em. If I remember correctly I was like "Wait, WHO?? Have I MET him??" Only thing more pathetic than claiming stunt work on Power Rangers as the highlight of your life is lying about sleeping with the girl who did stunt work on Power Rangers as the highlight of your life.
Tuesday, September 01, 2009
Insomnia, 90s style
Probably haven't seen an X-Files episode in 3 years, but in 3 seconds passing SyFy I can identify episode year & title.
Firewalker season 2.
On the plus side, my brain cells previously used to store crucial ST:TNG episode data have all been overwritten with healthcare facts.
Just typing the assinine moniker "SyFy" bumped me from a 3 to a 5 on the Kinsey scale. Hold on lesbians, I'm almost there!!
Firewalker season 2.
On the plus side, my brain cells previously used to store crucial ST:TNG episode data have all been overwritten with healthcare facts.
Just typing the assinine moniker "SyFy" bumped me from a 3 to a 5 on the Kinsey scale. Hold on lesbians, I'm almost there!!
Saturday, August 22, 2009
Today would have been Mom's 70th b-day
Probably would have celebrated at Lawry's Steakhouse or Tokyo Delves. And Gospel Sunday Brunch tomorrow.
Please don't smoke, my friends!! I want more time with you...
Please don't smoke, my friends!! I want more time with you...
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Sunday, August 16, 2009
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Great screenwriting resource
Everyone needs to research beat sheets when they're tackling a new show or genre...check out this site to contribute your "homework" or borrow someone else's.
Beat Sheet Central.
Beat Sheet Central.
Monday, August 03, 2009
Saturday, August 01, 2009
Awwww...ANOTHER awesome interview about THE COMMUNE!
Thanks for the kind words, Brian!
ROGUE CINEMA Interviews:
An Interview with Elisabeth Fies - By Brian Morton
Posted on Saturday, August 01, 2009 @ 00:50:23
"For a long time, when you mentioned the term ‘indie movie’ people had one thought in their mind, a young guy, with a camcorder, in the backyard, making some kind of dumb-ass zombie movie. Well, those days are gone! Now-a-days, indie filmmakers are enlightened, thoughtful filmmakers, attempting to make not just scary or gory movies, but giving us little pieces of art that main-stream Hollywood can’t (or won’t) touch. One of the filmmakers out there doing her best is Elisabeth Fies, who gave us The Commune (that I reviewed last month, check out my review of The Commune here). Elisabeth is the kind of filmmaker who thinks before she acts and isn’t afraid to take her time to get it right…as you can see in The Commune. So, I couldn’t help but want to catch up with her and find out a bit more about this up and coming filmmaker."
...continue
To catch you up from Brian Morton's review last month:
"The Commune is an interesting indictment of religion and how easily something that seems benign, even gentle, can turn evil and malevolent! The story is great, the acting is strong and Fies has put together an amazing movie."
ROGUE CINEMA Interviews:
An Interview with Elisabeth Fies - By Brian Morton
Posted on Saturday, August 01, 2009 @ 00:50:23
"For a long time, when you mentioned the term ‘indie movie’ people had one thought in their mind, a young guy, with a camcorder, in the backyard, making some kind of dumb-ass zombie movie. Well, those days are gone! Now-a-days, indie filmmakers are enlightened, thoughtful filmmakers, attempting to make not just scary or gory movies, but giving us little pieces of art that main-stream Hollywood can’t (or won’t) touch. One of the filmmakers out there doing her best is Elisabeth Fies, who gave us The Commune (that I reviewed last month, check out my review of The Commune here). Elisabeth is the kind of filmmaker who thinks before she acts and isn’t afraid to take her time to get it right…as you can see in The Commune. So, I couldn’t help but want to catch up with her and find out a bit more about this up and coming filmmaker."
...continue
To catch you up from Brian Morton's review last month:
"The Commune is an interesting indictment of religion and how easily something that seems benign, even gentle, can turn evil and malevolent! The story is great, the acting is strong and Fies has put together an amazing movie."
Flex Force 5
Check out maesto inker Corey Miller's surf psychobilly band Flex Force 5 He's the drummer.
Corey was super cool to me at High Voltage when I was on LA INK, and of course we got talking PISTOLERAS. Wouldn't he be fun??
Corey was super cool to me at High Voltage when I was on LA INK, and of course we got talking PISTOLERAS. Wouldn't he be fun??
Dan Smith!
Hey! Here's my tattoo artist!
He is indeed "very gentle". Check out his portfolio at Dan Smith Tattoos.com
He is indeed "very gentle". Check out his portfolio at Dan Smith Tattoos.com
Brenda and I were there...
and it was an amazing night of talent with The Commune's composer Danny B. Harvey and a half dozen of his handpicked guests. Shout out to Jenna Ross, (nee Jenna Cide), vocalist on many of Danny's tracks for The Commune. Amazing!
Friday, July 31, 2009
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
73 ways to become a better writer
I love this post, and personally do most of the advice. So hop to it, soldier!
Monday, July 27, 2009
You need this "luxury"
If you are looking for sunglasses or wear prescription specs...even if you're from out of town...you MUST save your money and
GO to GOGOSHA.
The experience is described perfectly by Yelp users in this link...
The most important thoughts I want to leave with you:
1) Your glasses are on YOUR FACE. Every day. The single most important part of your body that everyone assesses you by. Whether your dateable, promotable, hireable, trustworthy, have good judgement, are likable. It's the thing that is most YOU.
2) You've never received expert customer service picking out your glasses before. Yes, even if you went to expensive places. Read these reviews and mull over your past experiences, and think how different it would be if you trusted the person in the shop as the WORLD'S EXPERT, and a PARTNER whose goal was to make you look like THE BEST YOU.
3) After falling in love with your new glasses, you'll feel embarrassed about what you've had on your face. So start now!!
4)If you're still not convinced, check out Julia Gogosha's blog of actual thrilled customers turning from ugly ducklings and frogs into swans and princes...her new before/after photos are SUBLIME ART.
Go go GOGOSHA!
GO to GOGOSHA.
The experience is described perfectly by Yelp users in this link...
The most important thoughts I want to leave with you:
1) Your glasses are on YOUR FACE. Every day. The single most important part of your body that everyone assesses you by. Whether your dateable, promotable, hireable, trustworthy, have good judgement, are likable. It's the thing that is most YOU.
2) You've never received expert customer service picking out your glasses before. Yes, even if you went to expensive places. Read these reviews and mull over your past experiences, and think how different it would be if you trusted the person in the shop as the WORLD'S EXPERT, and a PARTNER whose goal was to make you look like THE BEST YOU.
3) After falling in love with your new glasses, you'll feel embarrassed about what you've had on your face. So start now!!
4)If you're still not convinced, check out Julia Gogosha's blog of actual thrilled customers turning from ugly ducklings and frogs into swans and princes...her new before/after photos are SUBLIME ART.
Go go GOGOSHA!
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Life Hacks from Brea Grant
My good friend Brea ran a great guests post of advice from me and mutual friends on little life improvements you can do for free. Enjoy the positivity!
And check out Brea Grant's appearance in Elle this month...hot!
And check out Brea Grant's appearance in Elle this month...hot!
Thursday, July 23, 2009
A meaningful life is not a popularity contest
"You are not on the earth to be shut up, and you are not on the earth to be shut down."
A great four-minute pep talk about why what other people think of you is none of your business, courtesy of Marianne Williamson.
Marianne and The Course of Miracles was a favorite of Mom's. I can't believe how young the lady looks; I've known her teachings all my life.
"You are not born to be at the effect of lovelessness, in other people or in yourself."
A great four-minute pep talk about why what other people think of you is none of your business, courtesy of Marianne Williamson.
Marianne and The Course of Miracles was a favorite of Mom's. I can't believe how young the lady looks; I've known her teachings all my life.
"You are not born to be at the effect of lovelessness, in other people or in yourself."
Monday, July 20, 2009
Knowing
I was blown away by KNOWING the other night, a film much better than I expected because I'd completely missed the reviews and ad campaign. The only films I can think of in the last decade that I had a similar pleasant surprise from along this scale were the original Pirates of the Carribean, and The Matrix.
My favorite sage Roger Ebert has an interesting philosophical essay about the central premise of Knowing here. But it's spoilerific by necessity, so please enjoy the movie first.
My favorite sage Roger Ebert has an interesting philosophical essay about the central premise of Knowing here. But it's spoilerific by necessity, so please enjoy the movie first.
Saturday, July 18, 2009
LA Ink
I'm getting tatted by Dan Smith on July 30th. No, there's no news on if or when it will air, probably won't know until a week before the airdate.
Just have to figure out where the h to get the tattoo...for some reason everyone's freaked about my arm and what I will look like in a wedding dress.
Um, people...I don't even have a boyfriend. Cart? Horse?
And if I meet him after I get the tattoo, wouldn't we hope he would love me AND the tattoo? :)
Just have to figure out where the h to get the tattoo...for some reason everyone's freaked about my arm and what I will look like in a wedding dress.
Um, people...I don't even have a boyfriend. Cart? Horse?
And if I meet him after I get the tattoo, wouldn't we hope he would love me AND the tattoo? :)
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Actual Match.com message
"Hello georgeous,
Impressing is what i describe your captivating profile as a near perfect description of what i desire in a woman,I mean what any man would seek for in a woman..."
So here I'm thinking, "spelling and grammar of a serial killer...but how did he know my childhood nickname was George? Maybe he's a Russian spy?"
"...Well i am a native of American,Borne in American and Raised in the states..."
I'm feeling this statement is like starting off with "To tell the truth,..." Like if it's the truth, why do you have to POINT OUT that it's the truth??
"I will like you to get back to me and lets know each other very well..You can also IM me on yahoo messenger...I will love to read from you,my love to be..."
More establishing of false intimacy, lack of details indicating it's a form letter he's mass emailing, aand no picture = Fail.
Analysis:
This Nigerian guy totally wants my social security number.
Impressing is what i describe your captivating profile as a near perfect description of what i desire in a woman,I mean what any man would seek for in a woman..."
So here I'm thinking, "spelling and grammar of a serial killer...but how did he know my childhood nickname was George? Maybe he's a Russian spy?"
"...Well i am a native of American,Borne in American and Raised in the states..."
I'm feeling this statement is like starting off with "To tell the truth,..." Like if it's the truth, why do you have to POINT OUT that it's the truth??
"I will like you to get back to me and lets know each other very well..You can also IM me on yahoo messenger...I will love to read from you,my love to be..."
More establishing of false intimacy, lack of details indicating it's a form letter he's mass emailing, aand no picture = Fail.
Analysis:
This Nigerian guy totally wants my social security number.
Women auteurs
Great series at UCLA the end of July/beginning of August on feminist directors working in "exploitation" films in the 70s and 80s. I'll be attending, along with many people from Pretty/Scary.
Thursday, July 09, 2009
Sunday, July 05, 2009
And there it is...
I'm clearly about to get funded, because I've had production nightmares all week. Hasn't been like this since I was shooting The Commune.
Thursday, July 02, 2009
More distribution doom and gloom
Because you indie filmmakers were getting too positive about the economy... ;)
Rethinking Gender Bias in Theatre
The New York Times has a great, well-researched article a reader recommended that suggests there are fewer female playwrights being produced because of female gatekeepers' prejudice against them.
I have to say, it gels with many of my personal experiences in Hollywood.
I have to say, it gels with many of my personal experiences in Hollywood.
Wednesday, July 01, 2009
LA INK
I did a long on-camera interview last week to be tattooed on LA Ink. It's with the network right now, and if they decide to pick me the tape goes in with a stack to the artists and they argue over who they want to work with. But then after that, I still could get the tattoo and be taped but not make it onto the final programs.
Interesting process I really enjoyed. Had a great time chatting with Jaime, the casting associate.
My angle was a female director working in a man's world, just like Kat and Hannah and Kim. Of course, Corey could be cool too because he's a guy who partners with empowered women and isn't diminished in the slightest.
Here's my rough idea of the tattoo, which the artist who picks me would then riff on:
It's based on Colonel Van Riper's battle strategy as explained in Malcolm Gladwell's BLINK of setting the theme, hiring the best people for the job, and then not micromanaging them in the field but allowing space for creative thinking on their feet and happy accidents. Everything I want to be as Woman King leader onset.
Interesting process I really enjoyed. Had a great time chatting with Jaime, the casting associate.
My angle was a female director working in a man's world, just like Kat and Hannah and Kim. Of course, Corey could be cool too because he's a guy who partners with empowered women and isn't diminished in the slightest.
Here's my rough idea of the tattoo, which the artist who picks me would then riff on:
It's based on Colonel Van Riper's battle strategy as explained in Malcolm Gladwell's BLINK of setting the theme, hiring the best people for the job, and then not micromanaging them in the field but allowing space for creative thinking on their feet and happy accidents. Everything I want to be as Woman King leader onset.
Lynchian nightmare
I had this whole weird dream last night that I'd made a movie that wasn't THE COMMUNE but had the same stars in it, but it was about everything else that is going on in my life right at this moment down to a script of a friend's I'm reading about a water park only I'd read the Vanity Fair article about Johnny Depp yesterday so it was a Disney water park and my nieces wanted Johnny's costume...
The overwhelming emotion of the dream was mortification that some scenes I thought had been cut were shown onscreen, and they were soft-focus and dragged on too long with bad camerawork and acting from the leads, and then there were sexual scenes of me that made no sense that were way too graphic, and everyone thought it was an amateur movie all about my ego. And it was the only showing we were ever going to have and I couldn't figure out how it was the wrong print. Then I went right into this other horrible graphic slasher nightmare about a sister who'd died but didn't die and came back into the family's life as an unrecognizable man to have sex with them all and then kill them, but the whole time I was thinking "This would make a great screenplay!" and when I woke up I was all sweaty trying to remember the dream and realized it was utter nonsense and not a story at all.
There you have it! Fevered dreams of a frazzled filmmaker...
The overwhelming emotion of the dream was mortification that some scenes I thought had been cut were shown onscreen, and they were soft-focus and dragged on too long with bad camerawork and acting from the leads, and then there were sexual scenes of me that made no sense that were way too graphic, and everyone thought it was an amateur movie all about my ego. And it was the only showing we were ever going to have and I couldn't figure out how it was the wrong print. Then I went right into this other horrible graphic slasher nightmare about a sister who'd died but didn't die and came back into the family's life as an unrecognizable man to have sex with them all and then kill them, but the whole time I was thinking "This would make a great screenplay!" and when I woke up I was all sweaty trying to remember the dream and realized it was utter nonsense and not a story at all.
There you have it! Fevered dreams of a frazzled filmmaker...
Monday, June 29, 2009
Referral
While I still have my sore throat, brother Brian is doing lots of interesting posts on the success of his new graphic novel Whatever Happened to the World of Tomorrow.
Friday, June 26, 2009
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
I'm having such a good day/night!
Some cool progressions with the movie, several of which I can't talk about. As always, you'll know when I can!
We have a fabulous new review up at Best Horror Movies. Pretty cool.
Hey, did anyone listen to my radio interview last week? Host Kurtis said it was super popular; had the most downloads. You can download the recording of WORST SHOW ON THE WEB's 6/15/09 episode to hear me talk for half on hour about THE COMMUNE and Chauntal Lewis losing her hand and becoming an activist. The hosts Kurtis and Harry, both Santa Rosans, were amazingly supportive and awesome. Thank you, guys!
Went with Brea Grant to the LA Film Festival to see HUMPDAY (Fabulous!) and finally met Mark Duplass (charming & brilliant...but more importantly, is his brother Jay single??).
(Speaking of film festivals, co-founder of DANCES WITH FILMS film festival Leslee Scallon has some great ideas about how we can support and increase female filmmakers' work in US festivals and at out multiplexes...she's a busy mom who's also still recovering from birthing the twelth year of DWF. But wanted to give you a heads up that she'll be guest columning here soon.)
Had a great planning conversation with editor Todd Miro about PISTOLERAS, then headed to the New Beverly to see the 2007 restoration 35mm print of ONCE UPON A TIME IN THE WEST. Still out of this world, but unimaginably better on a bigscreen with a worshipful audience.
B-day plans all week...it's a festivus!
Me and Randy Harris, talented writer/director of TINY LITTLE LIES.
We have a fabulous new review up at Best Horror Movies. Pretty cool.
Hey, did anyone listen to my radio interview last week? Host Kurtis said it was super popular; had the most downloads. You can download the recording of WORST SHOW ON THE WEB's 6/15/09 episode to hear me talk for half on hour about THE COMMUNE and Chauntal Lewis losing her hand and becoming an activist. The hosts Kurtis and Harry, both Santa Rosans, were amazingly supportive and awesome. Thank you, guys!
Went with Brea Grant to the LA Film Festival to see HUMPDAY (Fabulous!) and finally met Mark Duplass (charming & brilliant...but more importantly, is his brother Jay single??).
(Speaking of film festivals, co-founder of DANCES WITH FILMS film festival Leslee Scallon has some great ideas about how we can support and increase female filmmakers' work in US festivals and at out multiplexes...she's a busy mom who's also still recovering from birthing the twelth year of DWF. But wanted to give you a heads up that she'll be guest columning here soon.)
Had a great planning conversation with editor Todd Miro about PISTOLERAS, then headed to the New Beverly to see the 2007 restoration 35mm print of ONCE UPON A TIME IN THE WEST. Still out of this world, but unimaginably better on a bigscreen with a worshipful audience.
B-day plans all week...it's a festivus!
Me and Randy Harris, talented writer/director of TINY LITTLE LIES.
Monday, June 22, 2009
1 in 4 South African men admit to rape
One in four male South Africans surveyed admitted to committing rape, according to a research group.
Thursday, June 18, 2009
50 movie posters from Berlin
Breathtaking collection. They distill each movie down to the id.
I want some Jungian Berlin artist to interpret THE COMMUNE!!!
On second thought, maybe I don't... ;)
UPDATE: Or Poland and Polish artists, as Ray helpfully pointed out. Have I mentioned my fever still hasn't gone away? And apologies to fabulous Barbara Stepansky, the one person I know from Poland.
I want some Jungian Berlin artist to interpret THE COMMUNE!!!
On second thought, maybe I don't... ;)
UPDATE: Or Poland and Polish artists, as Ray helpfully pointed out. Have I mentioned my fever still hasn't gone away? And apologies to fabulous Barbara Stepansky, the one person I know from Poland.
A sonic scream from outside the Hollywood system...
By filmmaker Kate Perotti, it's MOMZ HOT ROCKS, a documentary on punk band member moms who are louder than their kids. Playing the Ventura Film Festival end of June.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
HollywoodFemmeGate continues...
Because women don't go to the movies and lead boring lives male viewers couldn't possibly find value in.
But a blow has been struck in the mighty northwest metropolis of progressive Seattle...
The Seattle International Film Festival has awarded the Jury Prize to a female director (Barbara Schroeder's Talhotblond) & top director awards to 3 more:
Best Director Golden Space Needle Award
Kathryn Bigelow, for The Hurt Locker (USA, 2008)
First runner up: Lynn Shelton, for Humpday (USA, 2009)
Second runner up: Kari Skogland for Fifty Dead Men Walking (UK/Canada, 2008)
And there were several more large prizes awarded to women.
Has this EVER happened in any other contest??
Congrats to women filmmakers, and to ALL of us!! Humans benefit when half of the population is valued.
Seattle International Film Festival's awards are a huge leap forward in what is the modern ghettoization of female stories.
Just to give you perspective, most screenwriting contests award less than a 1/5 of their prizes to women, and even at the truly independent and barrier-breaking Dances With Films festival there was only one female winner of the 13 awards given, and she was a co-director/writer/producer sharing the award with a male partner.
Maybe I'm just grasping at any little hope with the Seattle Film Festival's fantastic awards after this horrifying news out of Hollywood last week:
The Huffington Post
Thursday June 8, 2009
Women Don't Go to Movies
by Nia Vardalos
A little-known fact: some studios recently decided to no longer make female-lead movies.
Lately, I've been in meetings regarding a new script idea I have. A studio executive asked me to change the female lead to a male, because... "women don't go to movies."
Really?
When I pointed out the box office successes of Sex and The City, Mamma Mia, and Obsessed, he called them "flukes." He said "don't quote me on this." So, I'm telling everybody.
Oh...sigh.
Thanks to The Huffington Post for following up on this topic, especially after Ellen Snortland's article profiling me and Heidi as producers of THE COMMUNE with this slant just three days before.
I've personally been turned down by female managers who claim I'll never get funding for Pistoleras because "no one wants to see a female western."
Which means fellow women didn't even read page one of the screenplay that has won two big industry awards.
Here's one more interesting tidbit along the same subject, this time from respected online journal Cinematical. My favorite line from This article is "Women aren't flukes." My least favorite part is that there continue to be bone-headed comments to this brilliantly executed piece. If you replaced "female" with "black", your comments would seem unacceptable even to you, sir.
Cinematical:
Girls on Film: A Desire for Varied Female Protagonists is Not a Political Agenda
by Monika Bartyzel (ed. note: Wonder what the comments would have been like if it were Mark Bartyzel)
By now you've probably caught fellow Cinematical writer Dawn Taylor's posts about desiring female Pixar leads and wanting some Bechdel rule-abiding women in Star Trek. Both posts got their share of positive comments, but they also got a slew of knee-jerk reactions and vitriol. I don't want to rehash what Dawn already expressed well, nor get into another argument about specific female characterizations. Instead, I want to look into this neverending trend where any desire for a strong female character leads to complaints and accusations of a political agenda.
Ask for a certain type of female protagonist, discuss inequalities, gripe about the proliferation of poorly developed female characters, and in a flash, comments will pour in with a myriad of political catchwords like: feminist agenda, feminist rants, equality of the sexes, affirmative action, sexist conspiracy, and political correctness. These will be joined by painfully inaccurate sentiments that equate a desire for female success with wanting "every unfulfilled desire," Hollywood bending to charity and catering to specific audiences, wanting to exclude men from film, a lack of acceptance at the equality already reached, and of course, that including strong female protagonists is somehow sacrificing or tainting good work. (All of the reactions mentioned in this paragraph can be found in the comments on Dawn's two posts.)
The fact of the matter is: Wanting interesting and diverse female protagonists is not a political agenda. It's a widespread human trait found in both sexes: the desire to find camaraderie and others who are relatable and recognizable...
Please continue reading this fabulous article over at Cinematical.
Here's one more great recent mention on the topic. Unfortunately I can't seem to figure out who wrote it over at The Tracking Board. If it was a single straight man, sir, may I take you out to dinner? I'll even dress like Ripley.
"...One very interesting sidenote to this film, isn’t necessarily regarding this film directly, but the slow change Hollywood, and independent films are taking towards their choice in protagonists. Just in the past month alone, the amount of scripts we’ve seen sell, and new films we’ve seen cast, as well projects going in to production, it seems audiences are beginning to seek out the strong female lead.
“Today’s audience wants to see more and more strong women in film. Finally, film is getting exciting again.” director Alexandre Aja said in regards to his curious choice of Riley Steele in his new Piranha 3-D remake. (Aja also cast one of our favorite female leads to date with Cécile De France in his French release HAUTE TENSION.)
I know I’ve always had an eagerness and excitement to see the strong female lead return. Bring us back to the Ripley days of old. I think audiences are eager, and waiting."
I agree that audiences are eager and waiting. Now how do we convince the Gatekeepers funding the production of movies?
UPDATE: The comments section just became a Must-Read, as multi-talented, award-winning filmmaker Eric Escobar has shared his brilliant thoughts on race and gender casting in Hollywood, and whether they should and can be fought within the system (if you read his blog you know that's a NO).
But a blow has been struck in the mighty northwest metropolis of progressive Seattle...
The Seattle International Film Festival has awarded the Jury Prize to a female director (Barbara Schroeder's Talhotblond) & top director awards to 3 more:
Best Director Golden Space Needle Award
Kathryn Bigelow, for The Hurt Locker (USA, 2008)
First runner up: Lynn Shelton, for Humpday (USA, 2009)
Second runner up: Kari Skogland for Fifty Dead Men Walking (UK/Canada, 2008)
And there were several more large prizes awarded to women.
Has this EVER happened in any other contest??
Congrats to women filmmakers, and to ALL of us!! Humans benefit when half of the population is valued.
Seattle International Film Festival's awards are a huge leap forward in what is the modern ghettoization of female stories.
Just to give you perspective, most screenwriting contests award less than a 1/5 of their prizes to women, and even at the truly independent and barrier-breaking Dances With Films festival there was only one female winner of the 13 awards given, and she was a co-director/writer/producer sharing the award with a male partner.
Maybe I'm just grasping at any little hope with the Seattle Film Festival's fantastic awards after this horrifying news out of Hollywood last week:
The Huffington Post
Thursday June 8, 2009
Women Don't Go to Movies
by Nia Vardalos
A little-known fact: some studios recently decided to no longer make female-lead movies.
Lately, I've been in meetings regarding a new script idea I have. A studio executive asked me to change the female lead to a male, because... "women don't go to movies."
Really?
When I pointed out the box office successes of Sex and The City, Mamma Mia, and Obsessed, he called them "flukes." He said "don't quote me on this." So, I'm telling everybody.
Oh...sigh.
Thanks to The Huffington Post for following up on this topic, especially after Ellen Snortland's article profiling me and Heidi as producers of THE COMMUNE with this slant just three days before.
I've personally been turned down by female managers who claim I'll never get funding for Pistoleras because "no one wants to see a female western."
Which means fellow women didn't even read page one of the screenplay that has won two big industry awards.
Here's one more interesting tidbit along the same subject, this time from respected online journal Cinematical. My favorite line from This article is "Women aren't flukes." My least favorite part is that there continue to be bone-headed comments to this brilliantly executed piece. If you replaced "female" with "black", your comments would seem unacceptable even to you, sir.
Cinematical:
Girls on Film: A Desire for Varied Female Protagonists is Not a Political Agenda
by Monika Bartyzel (ed. note: Wonder what the comments would have been like if it were Mark Bartyzel)
By now you've probably caught fellow Cinematical writer Dawn Taylor's posts about desiring female Pixar leads and wanting some Bechdel rule-abiding women in Star Trek. Both posts got their share of positive comments, but they also got a slew of knee-jerk reactions and vitriol. I don't want to rehash what Dawn already expressed well, nor get into another argument about specific female characterizations. Instead, I want to look into this neverending trend where any desire for a strong female character leads to complaints and accusations of a political agenda.
Ask for a certain type of female protagonist, discuss inequalities, gripe about the proliferation of poorly developed female characters, and in a flash, comments will pour in with a myriad of political catchwords like: feminist agenda, feminist rants, equality of the sexes, affirmative action, sexist conspiracy, and political correctness. These will be joined by painfully inaccurate sentiments that equate a desire for female success with wanting "every unfulfilled desire," Hollywood bending to charity and catering to specific audiences, wanting to exclude men from film, a lack of acceptance at the equality already reached, and of course, that including strong female protagonists is somehow sacrificing or tainting good work. (All of the reactions mentioned in this paragraph can be found in the comments on Dawn's two posts.)
The fact of the matter is: Wanting interesting and diverse female protagonists is not a political agenda. It's a widespread human trait found in both sexes: the desire to find camaraderie and others who are relatable and recognizable...
Please continue reading this fabulous article over at Cinematical.
Here's one more great recent mention on the topic. Unfortunately I can't seem to figure out who wrote it over at The Tracking Board. If it was a single straight man, sir, may I take you out to dinner? I'll even dress like Ripley.
"...One very interesting sidenote to this film, isn’t necessarily regarding this film directly, but the slow change Hollywood, and independent films are taking towards their choice in protagonists. Just in the past month alone, the amount of scripts we’ve seen sell, and new films we’ve seen cast, as well projects going in to production, it seems audiences are beginning to seek out the strong female lead.
“Today’s audience wants to see more and more strong women in film. Finally, film is getting exciting again.” director Alexandre Aja said in regards to his curious choice of Riley Steele in his new Piranha 3-D remake. (Aja also cast one of our favorite female leads to date with Cécile De France in his French release HAUTE TENSION.)
I know I’ve always had an eagerness and excitement to see the strong female lead return. Bring us back to the Ripley days of old. I think audiences are eager, and waiting."
I agree that audiences are eager and waiting. Now how do we convince the Gatekeepers funding the production of movies?
UPDATE: The comments section just became a Must-Read, as multi-talented, award-winning filmmaker Eric Escobar has shared his brilliant thoughts on race and gender casting in Hollywood, and whether they should and can be fought within the system (if you read his blog you know that's a NO).
What's on people's minds?
Just curious what you're out there thinking about, stewing over, laughing with...how's your summer so far??
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Another radio interview for THE COMMUNE
I was interviewed on blogradio! Episode 6/15/09 "The Hair & Horror Show" by Worst Show On The Web.
I'm on from 79:00 to the end of the episode and twenty minutes on into the greenroom!
We discuss "The Commune", but spend most of the time on Chauntal Lewis and her Believe and Become foundation.
Thanks to the gracious and talented hosts, Angeleno Kurtis Bedford and Santa Rosan Harry Duke! It was a pleasure, guys! Chauntal Lewis and I appreciate your generousity!
I'm on from 79:00 to the end of the episode and twenty minutes on into the greenroom!
We discuss "The Commune", but spend most of the time on Chauntal Lewis and her Believe and Become foundation.
Thanks to the gracious and talented hosts, Angeleno Kurtis Bedford and Santa Rosan Harry Duke! It was a pleasure, guys! Chauntal Lewis and I appreciate your generousity!
Sunday, June 14, 2009
This is how you make a movie
Sorry, kids. Your father's STAR TREK was better.
Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan
*****
Space opera on a grand scale. Everything from the classic story structer, directing, acting to the score are pitch perfect. Genuine emotion and universal human issues are at stake here (friendship, fatherhood, death, revenge, responsibility, mentorship), and that is what makes this movie timeless. Families will enjoy it for decades to come, long after the latest special effects bonanza has faded from the local multiplex.
The screenwriters did an expert job of giving each character a fantastic moment built from their established storylines on the series, without being an irritating wink that detracts from the current story. Yet you needn't be a Star Trek fan to understand and love this movie. "How we face death is at least as important as how we face life...I was wrong about you and I'm sorry...I'm very proud to be your son." Even the eye candy addition of Kirstie Allie is a fleshed-out character who fits integrally into the plot and is given beautiful, genuine interactions with our stalwart crew.
Elegant, humanist, exciting, and moving. One of my few picks to take to a desert island, and the very definition of a five star film.
Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan
*****
Space opera on a grand scale. Everything from the classic story structer, directing, acting to the score are pitch perfect. Genuine emotion and universal human issues are at stake here (friendship, fatherhood, death, revenge, responsibility, mentorship), and that is what makes this movie timeless. Families will enjoy it for decades to come, long after the latest special effects bonanza has faded from the local multiplex.
The screenwriters did an expert job of giving each character a fantastic moment built from their established storylines on the series, without being an irritating wink that detracts from the current story. Yet you needn't be a Star Trek fan to understand and love this movie. "How we face death is at least as important as how we face life...I was wrong about you and I'm sorry...I'm very proud to be your son." Even the eye candy addition of Kirstie Allie is a fleshed-out character who fits integrally into the plot and is given beautiful, genuine interactions with our stalwart crew.
Elegant, humanist, exciting, and moving. One of my few picks to take to a desert island, and the very definition of a five star film.
Friday, June 12, 2009
me me me, blah blah blah
So the one thing that's been missing forever now from our press kit and website is my Director's Statement. Which is a bad thing not to have, because reporters want to hear from the director. They want to know the director cared, and wasn't just for hire.
But I haven't been able to bring myself to do it. Partly because it felt waaaay egotastic, and partly because it would literally be easier for me to write you a 70 page thesis on THE COMMUNE.
I'm not kidding. You've noticed how verbose I am, oui? Well...I have notebooks full of what and why and how things were done on THE COMMUNE. It's all purposeful, so how am I supposed to distill that down to one PR page and tell you I'm awesome so write about my movie?
Well apparently that's what sisters are for. Brenda woke up at 6 am yesterday and tossed this genius out like a true Fies. I filled in some details, but the majority is all her expert listening of me.
ABOUT ELISABETH FIES
Already an associate producer on Indie Spirit-awarded CONVENTIONEERS, tyro writer/director Elisabeth Fies has finally arrived with her acclaimed psychological thriller THE COMMUNE. Nobody loves watching movies more than Elisabeth. But, her years of education have trained her to see things others may not. From her undergraduate days examining pornography with Supreme Court expert witness Professor Neil Malamuth at UCLA, to her Graduate work at New School University in New York where she mastered in Media Studies, Elisabeth refined her intention of making responsible media with a message.
Returning to UCLA to complete her post Graduate Screenwriting Certificate provided the last piece of the puzzle for Elisabeth Fies to really understand the key elements required to make a good movie, which she feels are: structure, tone and purpose. “When any of these are faulty, it’s easy to lose your audience. I made it my mission to control the tone in THE COMMUNE.”
To date, Elisabeth has seen over five thousand movies and is ranked as #6 movie reviewer for NetFlix. While many movies have made an impact on her, her favorite movie remains a tie from twenty years ago. Elisabeth adores TERMINATOR 2 for its expert use of blockbuster storytelling to imbue a message of peace and feminism. But after viewing the emotionally raw SEX, LIES AND VIDEOTAPE, she was inspired as she knew filmmaking would be the vehicle she would use to share her viewpoint with others. Elisabeth claims the three movies that directly influenced the making of THE COMMUNE were THE WICKER MAN, CHINATOWN, and DON'T LOOK NOW. After watching THE WICKER MAN, Elisabeth knew it was time to return to the 1970s thriller/horror masters to make a movie that subverted audiences' subconscious knowledge of genre mores, and like DON'T LOOK NOW make them care deeply about the characters whose pain they are watching.
Going home to the familiar surroundings of Sonoma County to film her feature was a comfort, and provided amazing locations never seen before on the big screen. Elisabeth is quick to point out that while Isis Oasis Sanctuary was a place she visited on more than one occasion while growing up, it is polar opposite to the type of commune depicted in her movie. It’s more of a wildlife sanctuary and the owner, Loreon Vigne, has been there since Fies’s childhood visits. They very graciously accommodated the cast and crew for 12 of their 18-day shoot schedule.
There were times in her Bohemian childhood that Fies remembers feeling like she was “the only grown up in the room” and recalls when she was encouraged to wrap a growling Ocelot around her neck, which she thought better of and didn’t understand what part of “angry cat” the adults outside the wild animal's cage did not see. It is that uneasiness that she used as a cornerstone throughout THE COMMUNE. “I find narcissism and lack of boundaries very dangerous and frightening.”
Contrary to making a statement about organized religion, Elisabeth guides her audience to consider the inherent dangers of blindly following cult leaders by depicting how truly disposable individual members may become. In addition, Fies tackles the topic of genetic cloning and megalomaniac's desire for eternal life through offspring. These are relevant, sensational topics both nationally (the Texas cult “Yearning for Zion Ranch”) as well as internationally (the “House of Horror” in Austria). At the world premiere Q & A for THE COMMUNE, Elisabeth remarked to a cheering crowd “I'm not against organized religion, I'm against hypocrisy. If you say you're about love and crystals, be about love and crystals. Don't hoard all the money and eff little girls.”
THE COMMUNE utilizes the archetypal trinity Virgin, Mother, Crone in the three female leads. It has a heavy undertone of mythology to showcase its message, from the naming of characters to the background images in each scene. Elisabeth’s goal is to expose taboo topics that have existed for thousands of years, crossing over cultural lines, coming at the expense of women and ultimately civilized societies. She also depicts the three different reactions women have to incest, as well as giving all three generations of women a sex and dance scene to express their varying sexuality.
In prepping to lead a male crew, Elisabeth incorporated several command styles, including THE FIVE LOVE LANGUAGES, and brilliant military strategist Colonel Van Riper's IN COMMAND AND OUT OF CONTROL. She also received advice from boundary-breaking studio film director and master of horror Katt Shea. Many of the crew had never before worked for a “lady director”, and are anxious to be on Elisabeth's next film. "This time I got naked in front of the crew when I couldn't find an actress who would do nudity. Next time I'm buying us all platoon tattoos."
Upcoming projects include executive producing the horror anthology I HATE LA (going into production in July 2009) and raising the money for PISTOLERAS, her multiple-award-winning and beloved blockbuster screenplay about a clique of outsider teenage girls who are sold into a Mexican sex slavery ring and fight back to free all the children.
But I haven't been able to bring myself to do it. Partly because it felt waaaay egotastic, and partly because it would literally be easier for me to write you a 70 page thesis on THE COMMUNE.
I'm not kidding. You've noticed how verbose I am, oui? Well...I have notebooks full of what and why and how things were done on THE COMMUNE. It's all purposeful, so how am I supposed to distill that down to one PR page and tell you I'm awesome so write about my movie?
Well apparently that's what sisters are for. Brenda woke up at 6 am yesterday and tossed this genius out like a true Fies. I filled in some details, but the majority is all her expert listening of me.
ABOUT ELISABETH FIES
Already an associate producer on Indie Spirit-awarded CONVENTIONEERS, tyro writer/director Elisabeth Fies has finally arrived with her acclaimed psychological thriller THE COMMUNE. Nobody loves watching movies more than Elisabeth. But, her years of education have trained her to see things others may not. From her undergraduate days examining pornography with Supreme Court expert witness Professor Neil Malamuth at UCLA, to her Graduate work at New School University in New York where she mastered in Media Studies, Elisabeth refined her intention of making responsible media with a message.
Returning to UCLA to complete her post Graduate Screenwriting Certificate provided the last piece of the puzzle for Elisabeth Fies to really understand the key elements required to make a good movie, which she feels are: structure, tone and purpose. “When any of these are faulty, it’s easy to lose your audience. I made it my mission to control the tone in THE COMMUNE.”
To date, Elisabeth has seen over five thousand movies and is ranked as #6 movie reviewer for NetFlix. While many movies have made an impact on her, her favorite movie remains a tie from twenty years ago. Elisabeth adores TERMINATOR 2 for its expert use of blockbuster storytelling to imbue a message of peace and feminism. But after viewing the emotionally raw SEX, LIES AND VIDEOTAPE, she was inspired as she knew filmmaking would be the vehicle she would use to share her viewpoint with others. Elisabeth claims the three movies that directly influenced the making of THE COMMUNE were THE WICKER MAN, CHINATOWN, and DON'T LOOK NOW. After watching THE WICKER MAN, Elisabeth knew it was time to return to the 1970s thriller/horror masters to make a movie that subverted audiences' subconscious knowledge of genre mores, and like DON'T LOOK NOW make them care deeply about the characters whose pain they are watching.
Going home to the familiar surroundings of Sonoma County to film her feature was a comfort, and provided amazing locations never seen before on the big screen. Elisabeth is quick to point out that while Isis Oasis Sanctuary was a place she visited on more than one occasion while growing up, it is polar opposite to the type of commune depicted in her movie. It’s more of a wildlife sanctuary and the owner, Loreon Vigne, has been there since Fies’s childhood visits. They very graciously accommodated the cast and crew for 12 of their 18-day shoot schedule.
There were times in her Bohemian childhood that Fies remembers feeling like she was “the only grown up in the room” and recalls when she was encouraged to wrap a growling Ocelot around her neck, which she thought better of and didn’t understand what part of “angry cat” the adults outside the wild animal's cage did not see. It is that uneasiness that she used as a cornerstone throughout THE COMMUNE. “I find narcissism and lack of boundaries very dangerous and frightening.”
Contrary to making a statement about organized religion, Elisabeth guides her audience to consider the inherent dangers of blindly following cult leaders by depicting how truly disposable individual members may become. In addition, Fies tackles the topic of genetic cloning and megalomaniac's desire for eternal life through offspring. These are relevant, sensational topics both nationally (the Texas cult “Yearning for Zion Ranch”) as well as internationally (the “House of Horror” in Austria). At the world premiere Q & A for THE COMMUNE, Elisabeth remarked to a cheering crowd “I'm not against organized religion, I'm against hypocrisy. If you say you're about love and crystals, be about love and crystals. Don't hoard all the money and eff little girls.”
THE COMMUNE utilizes the archetypal trinity Virgin, Mother, Crone in the three female leads. It has a heavy undertone of mythology to showcase its message, from the naming of characters to the background images in each scene. Elisabeth’s goal is to expose taboo topics that have existed for thousands of years, crossing over cultural lines, coming at the expense of women and ultimately civilized societies. She also depicts the three different reactions women have to incest, as well as giving all three generations of women a sex and dance scene to express their varying sexuality.
In prepping to lead a male crew, Elisabeth incorporated several command styles, including THE FIVE LOVE LANGUAGES, and brilliant military strategist Colonel Van Riper's IN COMMAND AND OUT OF CONTROL. She also received advice from boundary-breaking studio film director and master of horror Katt Shea. Many of the crew had never before worked for a “lady director”, and are anxious to be on Elisabeth's next film. "This time I got naked in front of the crew when I couldn't find an actress who would do nudity. Next time I'm buying us all platoon tattoos."
Upcoming projects include executive producing the horror anthology I HATE LA (going into production in July 2009) and raising the money for PISTOLERAS, her multiple-award-winning and beloved blockbuster screenplay about a clique of outsider teenage girls who are sold into a Mexican sex slavery ring and fight back to free all the children.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
The Dances With Films festival crowd
Sunset Laemmle 5, packed! We love it!
I didn't tell you, we almost didn't get into our own movie! Yikes and cool!
Monday, June 08, 2009
Flip
Check out my friend's funny, multiple-award-winning 48 hour short film! Matt Orchowski was the key grip on THE COMMUNE, as well as playing two characters in the film. He's a great guy. And here you get to see his amazing work as his REAL day job: a talented DP!
Hit "full screen" to really see it:
Matt drove all the way out from Vegas to be at our world premiere! How cool is THAT? Can't wait to work again with someone so talented, tenacious, fun, egoless, AND supportive and loyal...he's got everything you need to "make it".
Hit "full screen" to really see it:
Matt drove all the way out from Vegas to be at our world premiere! How cool is THAT? Can't wait to work again with someone so talented, tenacious, fun, egoless, AND supportive and loyal...he's got everything you need to "make it".
Sunday, June 07, 2009
The Huffington Post reviews The Commune
Are you kidding me???? What an honor.
The freaking Huffington Post article.
Front page of the Entertainment section! Has been for days!!!
The freaking Huffington Post article.
Front page of the Entertainment section! Has been for days!!!
Gogosha Face of the Day
Look at what amazingly rad awesome talented adorable hiptress fashionmaker Julia Gogosha did for me on my premiere day.
Do I have the coolest friends, or what? I am SOOOO lucky!
Do I have the coolest friends, or what? I am SOOOO lucky!
Thursday, June 04, 2009
Insight 101
Don't you get pissed when people tell you you can't write something on your own blog/site/twitter/facebook account??
They come on to your site, tell you you're wrong, and in so many words to shut the eff up??
I just saw Back to the Future again where Marty's fatal flaw was being called chicken...it would totally goad him into doing something stupid to prove he wasn't.
Mine is a man telling me I can't speak.
And whenever I stick up for myself after being attacked and told to shut down, it's always the same reaction: shock that I have an opinion, and hurt that I wasn't thrilled to be talked down to and set straight by his kingly wisdom.
Usually by someone whose opinion I don't respect. Someone who doesn't have the education and life experience I seek out in a person whose advice I'm actually asking for. Certainly not the type of person who sees the world in such black and white terms they would have the lack of boundaries to come into your world and tell you you're an idiot and only they are right. Wow. Just...wow. Must be nice living in Candyland.
I have so many friends with differing opinions, and I would DIE for their right to have them. I love them for it. But I respect them by not telling them they're wrong, or by telling them what they should think. And this blog is just where I say what I think. You can read or not read, agree or disagree...it's my space for my opinion.
I can't figure out where they're coming from. What do they want to achieve by telling me I don't have a right to free speech? Do they care about me and want to protect me from my own opinion? Do they really think only they are right and no one else can think for themselves, particularly women with their little bird brains? What do they think they're going to accomplish with their patronizing speeches to me?
Because what happens is: I see fucking flames! After all we've been through as women to get the ability to vote, to sit at the same table, to speak our minds... a guy telling me I can't say what I want to, especially in my own hard-earned webspace I've built is such a horrible, threatening personal attack it's just, just arrrrrrgh!!!....
It totally invalidates my core values I believe no human can live without...self-expression, partnership, empowerment, love, fun, enthusiasm...
Then there's the whole I'm the youngest child thing, so my opinion has already been invalidated most my life...and there's the public head injury thing, so you can SEE how I would find it utterly charming and winning to be told by a man that my brain doesn't work. Sign me up for more of that!!
Finally getting this. And now I need to stop falling for it. And just let it slide by.
Delete comment. Delete "friendship." Boundaries up!
They come on to your site, tell you you're wrong, and in so many words to shut the eff up??
I just saw Back to the Future again where Marty's fatal flaw was being called chicken...it would totally goad him into doing something stupid to prove he wasn't.
Mine is a man telling me I can't speak.
And whenever I stick up for myself after being attacked and told to shut down, it's always the same reaction: shock that I have an opinion, and hurt that I wasn't thrilled to be talked down to and set straight by his kingly wisdom.
Usually by someone whose opinion I don't respect. Someone who doesn't have the education and life experience I seek out in a person whose advice I'm actually asking for. Certainly not the type of person who sees the world in such black and white terms they would have the lack of boundaries to come into your world and tell you you're an idiot and only they are right. Wow. Just...wow. Must be nice living in Candyland.
I have so many friends with differing opinions, and I would DIE for their right to have them. I love them for it. But I respect them by not telling them they're wrong, or by telling them what they should think. And this blog is just where I say what I think. You can read or not read, agree or disagree...it's my space for my opinion.
I can't figure out where they're coming from. What do they want to achieve by telling me I don't have a right to free speech? Do they care about me and want to protect me from my own opinion? Do they really think only they are right and no one else can think for themselves, particularly women with their little bird brains? What do they think they're going to accomplish with their patronizing speeches to me?
Because what happens is: I see fucking flames! After all we've been through as women to get the ability to vote, to sit at the same table, to speak our minds... a guy telling me I can't say what I want to, especially in my own hard-earned webspace I've built is such a horrible, threatening personal attack it's just, just arrrrrrgh!!!....
It totally invalidates my core values I believe no human can live without...self-expression, partnership, empowerment, love, fun, enthusiasm...
Then there's the whole I'm the youngest child thing, so my opinion has already been invalidated most my life...and there's the public head injury thing, so you can SEE how I would find it utterly charming and winning to be told by a man that my brain doesn't work. Sign me up for more of that!!
Finally getting this. And now I need to stop falling for it. And just let it slide by.
Delete comment. Delete "friendship." Boundaries up!
Wednesday, June 03, 2009
2 of my favorite people on one of my favorite topics
It doesn't get better or more important than Ellen Snortland and Gavin DeBecker telling us how to keep our women safe in this country. A must read.
YES!!! Heathers sequel in the works
And my life is complete. A bus accident is now calling my name...
As if it weren't enough...
to worry about Friday night...I'm also naked in the movie, Brenda thinks people will fall asleep, AND...
I just starting counting how many exes will be in attendance.
Blimey! I get around a lot for someone who doesn't get around a lot.
Guess that's what nine years of living in LA does to a gal.
I just starting counting how many exes will be in attendance.
Blimey! I get around a lot for someone who doesn't get around a lot.
Guess that's what nine years of living in LA does to a gal.
Tuesday, June 02, 2009
Um...THANKS?!!
Big Sister:
"Hey, remember how three different guys fell asleep when you screened THE COMMUNE for them at our house? Aren't you worried the whole audience will do that at 1 am?
Especially after we've given them alcohol at the benefit?"
...!
Well, I WASN'T....
"Hey, remember how three different guys fell asleep when you screened THE COMMUNE for them at our house? Aren't you worried the whole audience will do that at 1 am?
Especially after we've given them alcohol at the benefit?"
...!
Well, I WASN'T....
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Hey! I wanted the VANILLA twist...
Well that's just weird and cool.
My big bro (the Eisner winner) has been waiting for a release date for his sophomore graphic novel WHATEVER HAPPENED TO THE WORLD OF TOMORROW...turns out it's going to be the day after my feature's world premiere!
Even cooler that he's still flying down to see my midnight show!
My big bro (the Eisner winner) has been waiting for a release date for his sophomore graphic novel WHATEVER HAPPENED TO THE WORLD OF TOMORROW...turns out it's going to be the day after my feature's world premiere!
Even cooler that he's still flying down to see my midnight show!
WTF?
Just woke up from a dream where I was arguing vehemently that back in MY day popsingers could actually sing. And I named Laura Brannigan, Lita Ford, Pat Benatar, Gloria Estefan as proof.
Wow. Just...wow. That's one effed up subconscious.
Wow. Just...wow. That's one effed up subconscious.
Friday, May 29, 2009
I feel so guilty!
I come back from Europe and both Stat and Hero have brand new patches of grey hair...
I'm even stressing out my doggies!
I'm even stressing out my doggies!
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Jeebus
My friend Julia Gogosha (talented eyewear guru to the true stars) has a fantastic array of yummy yummy men up on her site. Check out her amazing handiwork on these hunks.
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Je t'aime Paris au printemps!
It's just gorgeous here. I'm having a wonderful, wonderful trip with my friends!
Friday, May 22, 2009
I love London!
Having such a blast doing all my computer work for the festival over here...I get to watch my friend's DVD collection, and when I pop out for food I'm in the tony Westminster neighborhood...it's working out smashingly!
Lots of fun things working out for the premiere and the movie in general...more announcements soon!
Lots of fun things working out for the premiere and the movie in general...more announcements soon!
Request for your feedback...
Anyone out there had a rough time buying THE COMMUNE tickets through the Dances With Films website?
I received an email someone couldn't make the purchase link work, and am following up on it...
I received an email someone couldn't make the purchase link work, and am following up on it...
Thursday, May 21, 2009
I call bullshit
Do you know the stats on how many women kill themselves by hanging?
And women with promising acting careers and a man sleeping next to them? In Paris?
In comparison, know the stats on how many women are murdered by their boyfriends?
Bullshit. The boyfriend killed her.
And women with promising acting careers and a man sleeping next to them? In Paris?
In comparison, know the stats on how many women are murdered by their boyfriends?
Bullshit. The boyfriend killed her.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Ellen Degeneres commencement speech
It's that time of year again, and Ellen has outdone every speaker everywhere. A gorgeous must see via Fishbowl LA.
Sunday, May 17, 2009
London calling!
Gorgeous here!
Already made googly eyes at an Italian waiter. I've got the mojo in Europe!
Still working like a dog on THE COMMUNE. Brenda took a pic of me at 5 am on the computer to prove it!
Already made googly eyes at an Italian waiter. I've got the mojo in Europe!
Still working like a dog on THE COMMUNE. Brenda took a pic of me at 5 am on the computer to prove it!
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Things that don't go together...
Discovered this jewelry-maker slash poet of feathers and words...
...with the seller moniker Mountainman...
who uses whimsical titles and beautiful language to describe his gorgeous one-of-a-kind creations...
but his photo looks like the Unibomber...
yet he is totally sensitive to what women want in earrings, and even adds incredibly thoughtful touches like allowing you to upgrade to gold or silver for those of us with sensitive ears.
Either this man is the reincarnation of Don Juan and he's wasting his skills alone in the mountains...
Or he has an oubliette where he instructs women to lotion up and try on his creations for them as he dances around with his pencil dick betwixt his legs.
Either way, I'm buying those Go Fly a Kite earrings for my world premiere. Don't you buy them first bitches, or i will cut you!
Don't make the mistake of thinking I don't have an oubliette, just because I'm renting in the valley.
...with the seller moniker Mountainman...
who uses whimsical titles and beautiful language to describe his gorgeous one-of-a-kind creations...
but his photo looks like the Unibomber...
yet he is totally sensitive to what women want in earrings, and even adds incredibly thoughtful touches like allowing you to upgrade to gold or silver for those of us with sensitive ears.
Either this man is the reincarnation of Don Juan and he's wasting his skills alone in the mountains...
Or he has an oubliette where he instructs women to lotion up and try on his creations for them as he dances around with his pencil dick betwixt his legs.
Either way, I'm buying those Go Fly a Kite earrings for my world premiere. Don't you buy them first bitches, or i will cut you!
Don't make the mistake of thinking I don't have an oubliette, just because I'm renting in the valley.
I love Richard Lawson
I could read his genius surrealist recaps of trash TV all. Night. Long.
And often do.
Ah, whimsy. Take me away, Calgon and Richard!
And often do.
Ah, whimsy. Take me away, Calgon and Richard!
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
You SOOO have plans Friday June 5th....
By a cool twist of fate, good friend and luminous actor Brea Grant ALSO has a feature making its World Premiere at Dances With FIlms film festival...in the 9:30 time slot right before ours!!!! How FREAKING COOL is THAT??!!!!
Her movie is CORPSE RUN, written and directed by John-Michael Thomas. Though it sounds like a horror movie (we should switch titles!), it actually looks like a twenty-something BIG CHILL...Check out the trailer and a scene from it here at their site.
So now you have to come out for a double feature!!!!
Looks like Brea was reaaaally hurting there, being the only chick in a shoot filled with yummy men...
Her movie is CORPSE RUN, written and directed by John-Michael Thomas. Though it sounds like a horror movie (we should switch titles!), it actually looks like a twenty-something BIG CHILL...Check out the trailer and a scene from it here at their site.
So now you have to come out for a double feature!!!!
Looks like Brea was reaaaally hurting there, being the only chick in a shoot filled with yummy men...
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
I am soooo tired...
I wish I had a clone or three!!! Grrr...
We have a brand spankin' new THE COMMUNE MOVIE
Facebook page!!
Join Us. Wahahahahahah....
We have a brand spankin' new THE COMMUNE MOVIE
Facebook page!!
Join Us. Wahahahahahah....
Sunday, May 10, 2009
FREE PRIZE!!! Who wants to play?
Our new 11x17 poster to hang in windows around town:
WANT ONE?!?
Feeling competitive? Get those winning juices going...
We need our premiere tickets to
SELL OUT THIS WEEK.
WHAT THIS WILL PROVIDE:
As the fastest-selling movie, Dances With Films will add another screening of THE COMMUNE to their festival...which in turn means twice the odds of winning Best Audience Award, getting agents for everyone, higher calibre distribution deal so that all of you can finally rent it at Blockbuster, Netflix, etc!!!!!
SEE how you can save us and be our heroes???!!!
AND you can help even if you live out of town!!!
Anyone who buys 2 tickets this week to the world premiere will receive an autographed poster (by at least me, but we should be able to wrangle everyone that night!) We would soooo appreciate it!
IF YOU LIVE OUT OF TOWN OR FALL ASLEEP BY 9 PM...
Don't cry! You can still play!
Buy two tickets as a donation!
We'll use YOUR TIX as comps for distribution companies, agents, VIPs...and you'll get a a signed poster in the mail! I'll even pick up the postage for free!
Tickets are only $10 each.
So only twenty bucks says you're going to be here at the wildest LA party, or receiving a big fat thank you in the mail from me!!!
WORLD PREMIERE
June 5 @11:45 pm
Laemmle Sunset 5
PAYPAL the 20 bucks to brendafies (at) aol You can also sign in through our EVITE or FACEBOOK page!
LOVE YOU!!!!
WANT ONE?!?
Feeling competitive? Get those winning juices going...
We need our premiere tickets to
SELL OUT THIS WEEK.
WHAT THIS WILL PROVIDE:
As the fastest-selling movie, Dances With Films will add another screening of THE COMMUNE to their festival...which in turn means twice the odds of winning Best Audience Award, getting agents for everyone, higher calibre distribution deal so that all of you can finally rent it at Blockbuster, Netflix, etc!!!!!
SEE how you can save us and be our heroes???!!!
AND you can help even if you live out of town!!!
Anyone who buys 2 tickets this week to the world premiere will receive an autographed poster (by at least me, but we should be able to wrangle everyone that night!) We would soooo appreciate it!
IF YOU LIVE OUT OF TOWN OR FALL ASLEEP BY 9 PM...
Don't cry! You can still play!
Buy two tickets as a donation!
We'll use YOUR TIX as comps for distribution companies, agents, VIPs...and you'll get a a signed poster in the mail! I'll even pick up the postage for free!
Tickets are only $10 each.
So only twenty bucks says you're going to be here at the wildest LA party, or receiving a big fat thank you in the mail from me!!!
WORLD PREMIERE
June 5 @11:45 pm
Laemmle Sunset 5
PAYPAL the 20 bucks to brendafies (at) aol You can also sign in through our EVITE or FACEBOOK page!
LOVE YOU!!!!
Saturday, May 09, 2009
Friday, May 08, 2009
Okee dokey smokeys!
No more QT hush-hush time...here's the scoop, sugars!
THE COMMUNE feature film will make its world premier at the prestigious DANCES WITH FILMS film festival. Opening night.
From our acceptance notification:
"It will screen in the very coveted position of Friday, June 5th at Midnight!"
...!
They like us! They really really like us!
You ready to party Rocky Horror-style? Better start napping now, fogies...then pop a Red Bull and head to the 'mune. It's going to be INSANE.
Info about DWF...on the record.
DANCES WITH FILMS
FILM FESTIVAL
Los Angeles, California - USA
June 5 to 11, 2009
The Hollywood Reporter raves that the DWF is "the defiant fest of Raw Talent."
"Here you will find more genuinely encouraging vital signs from the American independent movement than could be detected in all of Park City this last January."
- LA Weekly
Simply put, DANCES WITH FILMS (DWF) is one of the last, best film festivals dedicated to introducing unknown works to the film industry. Located in the heart of Hollywood, DWF provides a rare opportunity to fully engage critics, film professionals and audiences. And while other festivals depend on stars to attract audiences, DWF films are handpicked in strict accordance to quality, and quality alone.
This defiant code of independence has earned DWF solid respect and street credibility through its eleven years of existence. Consequently, an impressive array of distribution companies as well as film and television development departments cover DWF each year to see what's new and different, and who is truly going places in the indie world.
DWF offers Canon HD cameras and other prizes, including cash awards of up to $9,000 USD. Still, the 900 filmmakers who have taken part in the Festival since its inception insist that the best prize is to be a DWF alum. Film artists like Will Scheffer and Mark Olsen (HBO'S "Big Love") have premiered at DWF, and actors like Kathryn Morris ("Cold Case"), Kevin Rankin ("Friday Night Lights"), and director John Putch ("Ugly Betty", "Scrubs") have all started out with DWF films.
MISSION AND OBJECTIVE
No Politics. No Stars. No Sh*t.
The press and public love the Festival, as do the filmmakers who have attended and benefited from the energy and connections that result. DWF alums - and "Big Love" creators - Mark Olsen and Will Scheffer give seriously high praise: "DWF manages to keep its focus on heart and soul while still putting small films on the map." And writer/filmmakers Steve Coulter and Dee Wagner - part of Tyler Perry's wildly successful team - gratefully declare that "Not only was DancesWithFilms the hands-down coolest festival we went to, but simply put, it launched our film. It definitely upped our pedigree in the industry and opened many doors for us. We signed a deal to distribute our short, ETIQUETTE MAN, as a direct result of the screening at the Festival."
A HUGE thanks to everyone for your continued support...we couldn't have done it without you!!!!
See you June 5th on the bigscreen!!!!
THE COMMUNE feature film will make its world premier at the prestigious DANCES WITH FILMS film festival. Opening night.
From our acceptance notification:
"It will screen in the very coveted position of Friday, June 5th at Midnight!"
...!
They like us! They really really like us!
You ready to party Rocky Horror-style? Better start napping now, fogies...then pop a Red Bull and head to the 'mune. It's going to be INSANE.
Info about DWF...on the record.
DANCES WITH FILMS
FILM FESTIVAL
Los Angeles, California - USA
June 5 to 11, 2009
The Hollywood Reporter raves that the DWF is "the defiant fest of Raw Talent."
"Here you will find more genuinely encouraging vital signs from the American independent movement than could be detected in all of Park City this last January."
- LA Weekly
Simply put, DANCES WITH FILMS (DWF) is one of the last, best film festivals dedicated to introducing unknown works to the film industry. Located in the heart of Hollywood, DWF provides a rare opportunity to fully engage critics, film professionals and audiences. And while other festivals depend on stars to attract audiences, DWF films are handpicked in strict accordance to quality, and quality alone.
This defiant code of independence has earned DWF solid respect and street credibility through its eleven years of existence. Consequently, an impressive array of distribution companies as well as film and television development departments cover DWF each year to see what's new and different, and who is truly going places in the indie world.
DWF offers Canon HD cameras and other prizes, including cash awards of up to $9,000 USD. Still, the 900 filmmakers who have taken part in the Festival since its inception insist that the best prize is to be a DWF alum. Film artists like Will Scheffer and Mark Olsen (HBO'S "Big Love") have premiered at DWF, and actors like Kathryn Morris ("Cold Case"), Kevin Rankin ("Friday Night Lights"), and director John Putch ("Ugly Betty", "Scrubs") have all started out with DWF films.
MISSION AND OBJECTIVE
No Politics. No Stars. No Sh*t.
The press and public love the Festival, as do the filmmakers who have attended and benefited from the energy and connections that result. DWF alums - and "Big Love" creators - Mark Olsen and Will Scheffer give seriously high praise: "DWF manages to keep its focus on heart and soul while still putting small films on the map." And writer/filmmakers Steve Coulter and Dee Wagner - part of Tyler Perry's wildly successful team - gratefully declare that "Not only was DancesWithFilms the hands-down coolest festival we went to, but simply put, it launched our film. It definitely upped our pedigree in the industry and opened many doors for us. We signed a deal to distribute our short, ETIQUETTE MAN, as a direct result of the screening at the Festival."
A HUGE thanks to everyone for your continued support...we couldn't have done it without you!!!!
See you June 5th on the bigscreen!!!!
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